13

13 has been traditionally associated with poor-will, misfortune and death (unless you're an Italian then it means good fortune). However, most people don't know the underlying truth behind the number 13.

The Underlying Truth

Back when all the numbers were at peace, a horrible dictator by the name of 86 rose to power and forced all the numbers into forced labor (which was much more painful for the females mind you...). After 86 long years of suffering under this despotic dictator, the ambitious captain 13 took it upon himself to vanquish this evil overlord once and for all. For this, he gathered a huge fighting force, including the brave number 94, the cunning number 6, and the easily confused number 19. They were his chosen few- his captains, and together they rode into battle against 86 and his men. He tried to get the infamous number 69 on his team, but 69 stupidly rejected the offer. Go figure. The battle was long like long division and brutal like algebra, and a great number of numbers fell bravely. That includes 13 himself, who was slain near the end of the battle when he was trying to climb over the Fraction Tower to kill 86. He, however, did not die in vain, as he killed half of 86's army with his secret techniques like square-rooting, which causes the numbers to expand like crazy and subsequently blow up.

So Then, What's the Big Deal?

Because 13 died a long time ago, it's technically not supposed to exist. That's why we can't see it on floors or elevators or tombstones or Them.

Special things about the number 13

If you add the numbers in 13 up you get -3970.

13 is the only number that is written as 13.

13/1=13 no other number divided by 1 equals 13.

You do not have enough fingers to count to thirteen unless you are a Mutant or a Vulcan .

If you count to thirteen by ones you have to say a different number 13 times.

If you are to tired to count to 13 you become unable to count to thirteen.

Thirteen is spelt with less than thirteen letters.

13 is also the age when breasts begin to develop, and thus the age when men actually start to care about women.