Reading Practice: the Dead Parrot Sketch in Japanese

Month Python’s dead parrot sketch. It’s deservingly one of the most famous sketches in all comedy, in which John Cleese (Mr. Praline) attempts to return a dead parrot to a stubborn pet shop owner. I hope we’ve all had the opportunity to watch it and have laughed until our eyes watered and our stomachs hurt (if you haven’t, watch it now!).

Recently, I came across a translation of the dead parrot sketch in Japanese, and was so pleased with it that I decided to try to make it available and accessible to Japanese learners. The translation is very smooth and natural, so consider this a fun exercise in understanding “real” Japanese and translations that, although accurate, are often far from literal. I hope you’ll also find it a refreshing departure from your textbook dialogues.

I’ve added a large number of tool tips to the sketch below, so if you don’t understand something, try hovering over it with your mouse. If you’ve got a question on something not explained in a tooltip, please comment and let me know. I’ll try to either answer directly or add tooltips where necessary.

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* furigana (pronunciation guide) is added by Furigana Webglasses‘s free web service.
It’s automatically generatred so it might not be 100% correct.
Also, adding pronunciation guides screws up the site layout somewhat.

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Mr. Praline: 失礼しつれい、ちょっと言いいたいことがあるんだが…。ちょっと、お嬢じょうさん。
Hello, I wish to register a complaint. Hello, Miss?

Shopkeeper: お嬢じょうさんって、どういう意味いみどういう意味いみ： what is meant BY something. Many learners would say 何なんの意味いみ, but that would be asking the literal meaning of the word お嬢じょうさん？
What’cha mean, “miss”?

P: ああ､失敬しっけいliterally: ”(I was) rude.” But without です or しました following it, we get the feeling the apology is slightly superficial.。風邪かぜをひいてしまってねThis TE form isn't a command. It's the continuous form, so grammatically speaking the sentence is incomplete. The logical completion of the sentence has already been said: 失敬しっけい。私わたしは苦情くじょうを言いいに来きたんだ。
I’m sorry, I have a cold. I wish to make a complaint.

S: すみませんが、昼休ひるやすみなもんで［Noun + なもんで: ”because it's...”］ - The shopkeeper has omitted ”please come back another time”. Also note that な here is a form of だ／です。
Sorry, we’re closing for lunch.

P: 気きにするな。まだ３０分ふんもたっていないと思おもうが、さきほど貴店きてんきてん : 貴き is an honorary prefix／kanji. The speaker could have said この店みせ or あなたの店みせ, but the keigo term 貴店きてん helps convey the speaker’s sarcasm.からオウムを購入こうにゅうした。そのオウムのことでひとこと言いいたい。
Never mind that, my lad. I wish to complain about this parrot that I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.

S: ああ、ノルウェイジャン・ブルーね。何なにか、まずいまずい is an adjective you might not find in your textbook. It can mean ”bad” (of either food or a turn of events), ”awkward” or ”poor quality” ことでも？The speaker has omitted the verb ある from this sentence.
Oh yes, the Norwegian blue. What’s wrong with it?

P:まずいことがあったから、こうして言いいに来きてるんだ”I'll tell you what's...” doesn't work when translated literally, so the sentence is changed to　something like ”(of course) there's a problem, that's why I came to say it.”。オウムオウム means parrot. The kanji is 鸚鵡おうむ, in case you want to impress someone.が死しんでる。これが、その「まずいこと」だ。
I’ll tell you what’s wrong with it. It’s dead. That’s what’s wrong with it.

S: 何なにを言いうんですか、休やすんでるんですよ。
No, no. It’s resting. Look.

P: いいかねThis expression is like saying ”look here” or ”got it”, with a very authoritative tone.。このオウムが死しんでいることは、見みれば分わかる。今いまだって”even now”. Note that this だって is similar in meaning to でも.、ご覧らんの通とおり”exactly as you see”だ。
Look my lad, I know a dead parrot when I see one and I’m looking at one right now.

S: だから違ちがいますって。死しんでません。休やすんでるんです。
No, no. He’s not dead. He’s resting.

P: 休やすんでる？
Resting?

S: そうですともとも at the end of a sentence indicates a rather polite-sounding affirmation, intended to show the speaker’s unequivocalness. It is used when replying to a confirmation or clarification question.。ノルウェイジャン・ブルーは珍めずらしい鳥とりでしてね。この羽根はね羽根はね　（はね）: ”feathers”. 羽はね by itself is also read はね, but people tend to interpret just 羽わ to mean ”wing”. It’s merely a tendency, though. Both 羽根ばね and 羽わ can mean either feathers or wing. 翼つばさ （つばさ） can only mean ”wing”.の美うつくしいことと言いったら…と言いったら（ない） is an advanced (JLPT N2-N1) exclamation, used for emphasis. ”There’s no words to express the beauty of the plumage.”。
Yeah. Remarkable bird, the Norwegian blue. Beautiful plumage, idn’t it?

P: 羽根はねのことを言いってるんじゃない。このオウムは、完全かんぜんに死しんでいる。
The plumage don’t enter into it. It’s stone dead.

S: いいえ、眠ねむっているだけです。
No, no. It’s resting.

P: そうか。眠ねむっているなら、起おこそうじゃないか。オハヨー、オウムちゃん。お目め々を覚さましたら、おいしいイカイカ is squid. The (rarely-used) kanji is 烏賊いか, in case you were interested.をあげますよ～。オウムのポリーちゃん～。
Alright then. If it’s resting, I’ll wake it up. Hello Polly! I got a nice cup of fish for you when you wake up, Polly Parrot.

S: ほら、動うごいた。
There, it moved.

P: オウムじゃない。あんたあんた is a slightly condescending term for ”you”. We can clearly see that Mr. Praline is upset with the shopkeeper now.が鳥とりかごを押おしたんじゃないか。
No he didn’t, that was you pushing the cage.

S:押おしてません押おさなかった or 押おしませんでした would not work here. The simple past tense implies that some conditions were in place and ~ had a possibility of occurring. 押おしていません is a flat-out denial, much better suited to responding to accusations. Note also that this TE-いる is different from the progressive (~ing) form. Literally: ”(I am) not in the state which results from pushing.”。
I did not.

P: いいや、押おした。オハヨ～、ポリーちゃん～。オウムのポリーちゃん～、起おこっきしましょうねぇ。ポリーちゃん～。これを死しんだオウムと言いわずして、何なんと呼よぶI really like this expression. ”What would you call it if not...”. It’s kind of a set phrase.？
Yes you did. Hello, Polly! Poooollyyyy! Polly parrot, wake up! Poooolly! Now that’s what I call a dead parrot.

S: いいえ、気絶きぜつ”きぜつ: knocked out／unconscious”したんですよ。
No, no. It’s stunned.

P:あのなあのな is very similar to いいかね above, taking an authoritative ”look here, now” tone. It's possible to say あのな or あのね non-authoritatively, but you have to be extremely careful about context and your intonation.、死しんでることは今いまので”with／from (what happened) just now” (今いま、ここで見みせたことで)、じゅうぶん分わかっただろ。このオウムは明あきらかに死亡しぼうしてるの。私わたしがさっき買かいに来きたとき、オウムが動うごかないのは、喋しゃべり続つづけてクタクタに疲つかれてるからだってThis だって is different from the one above (the one similar in meaning to でも). This is the verb だ, plus the quoting marker って (= と).、保証ほしょうしたじゃないか。
Look my lad, I’ve had just about enough of this. That parrot is definitely deceased. And when I bought it not half an hour ago, you assured me that its lack of movement was due to it being tired and shagged out after a long squall.

S: フィヨルドが恋こいしい~が恋こいしい: to miss／long for ~のかも。
He’s probably pining for the fjords.

P: フィヨルドが恋こいしいだと？何なんだそりゃ。だったら、家いえに着ついたとたん~TA+途端とたん（とたん）: just when／after ~、オウムが仰向あおむけあおむけ: laying flat and facing upward.になって床ゆかに落おちたのは、どう説明せつめいしてくれるHow will you explain this to me?？
Pining for the fjords? What kind of talk is that? Look, why did it fall flat on its back the moment I got it home?

S: ノルウェイジャン・ブルーは仰向あおむけで寝ねるのが好すきなんですよ。きれいな鳥とりでしょ。それに見事みごとな羽根はね。
The Norwegian blue prefers keeping on its back. It’s a beautiful bird, lovely plumage…

P: 失礼しつれいを承知しょうちで”while knowing that it was discourteous (to you)”, this is how ”took the liberty to...” got translated.調しらべさせて貰もらったがね、どうしてオウムが最初さいしょにいた止とまり木きperchにずっと立たっていられたのか、分わかったよ。理由りゆうは一ひとつ、オウムが止とまり木きに釘付くぎづけされてた釘付くぎづけ is treated as a noun here, so the されてた is a conjugation of する, not of 付つける. The speaker could also have said 釘付くぎづけられた, which would be using 釘くぎ付つける (a verb).からだ。
Look, I took the liberty of examining that parrot, and I discovered that the only reason it had been sitting on its perch in the first place was that it had been nailed there.

S: そんなの、当あたり前まえじゃないですか。そうでもしなけりゃ、柵しがらみをこじ開あけてこじあける: to wrench open、ブーンと飛とんでっちまう。
Well of course he was nailed there otherwise he’d have muscled up through those bars and voom!

P: いいかね、このオウムに４０００ボルトの電気でんきをかけたってThis usage of ~TAって appears only in spoken Japanese, and is equivalent to ~TEも. (かけても)、飛とぶわけがない。これは、完かんぺきにご臨終りんじゅうなの。
Look matey, this parrot wouldn’t “voom” if I put 4000 volts through it. It’s bleeding demised.

S: いやいや、恋こいしいんです。
It’s not. It’s, it’s pining.

P: ホームシックなんかじゃない~なんかじゃない: it’s not anything like ~ (used for a sweeping negation)。お亡なくなりになったお亡なくなりになる: an honorific way of saying ”to die”んだ。このオウムは、この世よを去さったhas left this worldの。事切こときれてことぎれる: ”things have cut off／ended”, this word isn't any dictionary I could find, but the meaning is clear from context.しまった。息いきを引ひき取とりhas taken back his breath、神かみの御許おもとGod's (神かみの) honorable (御お) underneath (許もと), but ”underneath” is not meant literally. 神かみの御許おもと is ”a place near God”に逝いかれた逝ゆく　（いく）： it’s the verb 行いく, but 逝 is used when the destination is the afterlife.。これは「故ここ : a prefix used before names of people to indicate that the person is deceased.オウム」。死体したいA corpse/cadaver/dead body。命いのち尽つきて尽つきる (つきる): to be used up, all gone、永遠えいえんの眠ねむりについてる”has fallen into eternal sleep.” I personally would have gone with 安やすらかに眠ねむっている since it's a translation of ”rests in peace”。釘付くぎづけされてなきゃ、今頃いまごろはひな菊きくひなぎく : daisyいっぱいのお墓はかおはか: graveの下したでおねんねねんね is a ”cute” word for sleeping. Maybe a little like ”Nappy time”. Putting お before it is unusual and helps show that the speaker is using the word sarcastically.してたはずなんだ。オウムはその生涯しょうがいに幕まくを閉とじhas closed the curtains on life. その is not necessary here, but using it portrays the parrot and the parrot’s life as two separate entities.、昇天しょうてんしょうてん: ascended to heavenなされたなさる is an honorific equivalent to する, again the speaker is using keigo to convey sarcasm. Using the passive ~Aれる is also a keigo form, and grammatically speaking you’re not supposed to put it on a word that’s already keigo in nature, but many Japanese still do.の。これは「元もともと: ”ex-” prefix, as in ex-girlfriend/boyfriend.オウム」。
It’s not pining, it’s passed on. This parrot is no more. It has ceased to be. It’s expired and gone to meet its maker. This is a late parrot. It’s a stiff. Berift of life, it rests in peace. If you hadn’t nailed it to the perch it would be pushing up the daisies. It’s flung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This! is an ex-parrot.

S: 分わかりましたよ、お取とり替かえしましょ。
Well, I’d better replace it, then.

P: この国くにで何なにか買かおうと思おもったら、性根しょうこん尽つき果はてるまでしょうねつきはてるまで: until your perseverance has reached it’s limit文句もんくを言いうはめになる~はめになる: an advanced expression (JLPT N2-N1), indicating some result that the speaker is dissatisfied with.。
If you want to get anything done in this country, you’ve got to complain until you’re blue in the mouth.

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Okay, I’ll stop there. Hope you enjoyed that and please do comment with any questions you have!

advanced monty python parrot reading sketch Posted under Language & Study by Nihonshock.