Totem Talk talks about totems this week, in a stunning and entirely unexpected turn of events that no one could possibly have forseen even if said non forseeing types were actually Farseer Nobundo himself. Well, okay, he probably could have seen this coming. Matthew Rossi once again apologizes for the incoherence of the introductory paragraph. He didn't see this coming.

Okay, so you have decided to roll a new shaman. You start off in the starting area, fresh faced and ready to run around dropping totems only to discover you haven't got one yet. Confused, you run around with a mace hitting things until you reach level four, when the questgivers suddenly remember Oh, right, this class is supposed to be about dropping pointed, decorative sticks into the ground and you get your first totem quest.

The totem quests are a fun, sometimes easy, sometimes challenging way for a new shaman to get a handle on the class. Well, I think they're fun, anyway. Except that water one, that one is hard for a horde to pull off... well, to be fair it's not much easier for alliance, really. As you might expect, horde and alliance shamans have different questgivers and as such different quests in (mostly) different zones. The horde ones require a bit more travel than the alliance ones, which were put in for the expansion and, in my opinion, are slightly better in their design and play. But that's to be expected as Blizzard put the lessons they'd learned designing the original quests into play for the new ones.

Anyway, we'll talk about the horde quests first, as is fitting for horde shamans have been around longer.

More bad news for us Orc males out there. Ever since the problem with our shoulders showed up, Blizzard has promised, more than once, that it was a bug, and the fix was coming in 2.2. The only problem is that the shoulders haven't actually gone back to normal on the PTR at all. And now, as Kenneth pointed out in a tip (thanks!), the small Orc shoulders have appeared in the official art on Blizzard's armor page. If you flip between the Tier 5 set and the Arena season set 2, you can see that for the newer armor, the official art shows the small, puny shoulders.

Now, this doesn't actually mean that Blizzard is lying to us-- maybe one of their staffers had to get the armor set in, and accidentally used the small shoulder art. But it does at least tell us that Blizzard's right hand isn't talking to their left. And it does give just a little more credence to the conspiracy theorists among us-- why were the shoulders changed in the first place? Is Blizzard trying to stealth nerf those gigantic Orc shoulders?

Admittedly, it's not a huge deal (unless you're a male Orc and extremely proud of your larger than life shoulder armor). But you do have to wonder why Blizzard is being so skittish about this-- are they actually trying to make changes to the art that players just don't agree with? And if it is just a bug, why hasn't it been fixed yet?

By now you've heard of the Orc shoulder problem (and maybe you've even confronted Azeroth's Greatest Male Orc about it), but as MMO Champion shows, that was definitely not the only major bug that showed up in 2.1.3. There's a huge list of things going wrong-- Dwarf females' offhands are huge, Blood Elf males can walk through chairs, Cyclone can prevent players from getting their BG marks (!), and ghost wolves, when attacking, can now be seen carrying weapons. What happened?!

The problem becomes even stranger when you consider the patch notes-- almost nothing got changed compared to previous patches. All we saw were a few graphical changes, an added interface option, and some high level raid tuning. As someone asked yesterday, how can all of this seemingly unrelated stuff be breaking? If all Blizzard is doing is updating the mail system, what does the size of shoulderpieces on male Orcs have to do with it at all?

The answer is probably more complicated than we can know. As commenter Okoloth said yesterday, object-oriented programming (which Blizzard uses to code the game) is full of parent/child relationships, which means that a change in one class ("wearable items in the mail") can have strange effects all across the game ("Orc shoulders shrink"). And then there's the whole fact that even though the patch notes for 2.1.3 are small, that most likely doesn't mean Blizzard is slacking-- they could be implementing more subtle changes on the system (in preparation for future content that we don't know about yet), and those changes might be having an effect on the actual game we play.

Of course, just because we aren't being told why these things are happening doesn't mean we should give Blizzard a pass on fixing them ASAP (in my opinion, they shouldn't wait until the next patch to fix my shoulder size, thank you). But just because seemingly unrelated bugs are popping up doesn't mean they don't know what they're doing.

Most classes in WoW have some sort of lore hero that signifies everything that is good about their class. Druids follow Malfurion Stormrage, mages can look up to Jaina Proudmoore, and even the brutish warriors have Grom Hellscream and his axe. But what of the poor, misunderstood rogues? Where is their WoW hero? Dead? In hiding? Waiting for a raid invite? Stealthed somewhere and AFK?

The truth behind Azeroth's most famous rogue may be stranger than you can imagine. So quickly, before she kills you, meet ...

Who: Garona Halforcen.

What: Half-orc, half-something. We'll get into this more later.

History: Garona came of age before the First War, when the Burning Legion was beginning to form the orcs into an army to attack Azeroth. As a young woman, Garona traveled throughout Draenor and learned much about the local culture. The warlocks of the Burning Legion-controlled Shadow Council realized that they could have a use for an intelligent, well-versed orc, and they inducted her into the Stormreaver Clan. She quickly rose through the ranks to become a prominent member of the Shadow Council and the personal spy of its leader, Gul'dan.

Sometimes you don't have to slay a dragon, topple a kingdom or save the world to be famous in Azeroth. Sometimes you can just be a total bastard. So today we're featuring Teron Gorefiend -- Death Knight, deceptive questgiver, Black Temple boss and all-around badass.

Who: Teron Gorefiend.

What: Formerly an orc warlock, now an orc warlock's spirit in the body of an undead human knight, aka a Death Knight.

History: Teron Gorefiend was a member of the Shadowmoon Clan of orcs, based in Shadowmoon Valley. Along with his clan's leader, Ner'Zhul, he turned from the shamanistic legacy of the orcs into the dark teachings of the warlocks. Eventually, Ner'Zhul broke a pact he had made with the Burning Legion demon lord Kil'Jaeden and went on to a bright future as the Lich King. His apprentice, Gul'Dan, took up where he had left off and organized the orc clans into a single entity with a council of powerful warlocks supporting it, known as the Shadow Council. Gorefiend joined up with the Council.

During the first war against the Alliance, Gorefiend and the Shadow Council manipulated events from behind the scenes, including the assassination of King Llane Wrynn. But Gul'Dan overreached when he tried to gain secrets from the mind of Medivh, ending up trapped in a coma when Medivh died. Orgrim Doomhammer, chief of the Blackrock Clan, figured that it was time for a coup. Doomhammer killed the Shadow Council's puppet warchief and slaughtered as many Shadow Council warlocks as he could -- including Gorefiend.

Illidan, Medivh, Deathwing -- Know Your Lore has been kind of focused on villians so far, with a good reason. Villains are cool. I'd rather have the Burning Legion backing me up than the Cenarion Circle, and drinking with Illidan sounds more fun than with Malfurion. But sometimes there are heroes who are not only good, but also extremely cool. That is the case with this week's Know Your Lore subject, Grom Hellscream.

Who: Grommash Hellscream.

What: Chieftain of the Warsong orcs.

Reader Chris emailed this to me-- he and his guildmates in Gnomeburgers on Suramar-H were running around doing the Valentine's Day quests together. One of them, an Orc named Gruulok, punched out a few lines of Orc poetry, and they are hilarious. (Yes, I know the image to the right is a Night Elf, not an Orc, but didn't you ever learn that Love is blind?)

Sure, you might think that Orcs aren't very good at poetry, but I've heard my own Orc speak a few lines himself-- something about coming from the Orcs, eating with spoons and forks, and he loves to eat his pork. Gruulok's poetry is perhaps the best love poetry ever written in... well, I'm not quite sure what language this is. Orcish? If you're feeling a little Hordie (get it?) this evening, feel free to share these lines with your sweetie, and have a great Valentine's Day.

Tru Ork luv leevez skarz an brewzez, an eben browken nowzez,
but vilent luv iz much mor fun den duzenz o steenky rowzez.

Wen hartz brake an teerz duz fawl, datz wen tru luv endzez,
but watch yerz bak cuz Orky gurlz nowz how ta take de vengenz.

I guess since the expansion is finally done, all the Blizzard devs have time to talk. While reviews on the Burning Crusade are still forthcoming for the most part, there's been a couple dev interviews pop up post-launch.

There's not much you won't hear on the Collector's Edition DVD, but over on Firing Squad they have a short one-on-one with Jeff "Tigole" Kaplan. Most interesting is probably how the dev team is justifying adding the sci-fi stuff to Warcraft, via the Draenei and their spaceships-- Tigole suggests there's been an "otherworldly leaning" from the beginning, with the Titans and their worldmaking, and the alien origins of the Orcs. Also, he talks about his favorite creatures in Outland, and while I've only seen Fel Reavers so far, I was definitely impressed.

And at Gamespot UK's site, they catch Blizzard's Jon LeCraft. He says that the expansion's delay turned out to be time well spent and that the devs had a lot of fun making starter areas again (since their philosophies have changed so much-- that means we need more midgame content now, guys!). Finally, he acknowledges that the new 25-man cap on instances will mean breakups for some guilds, but that making everyone in the raid necessary was more important to Blizzard than simply allowing 15 people to stand around waiting for loot while the other 25 actually did the work.

Nothing super new, and unfortunately, no news about what's next, either in terms of an expansion or a patch direction. But we're definitely glad the devs are getting a chance to catch their breath, and learn some lessons from this week's release.

[ via Curse ]

You've got to have a favorite. Maybe they have a racial you just can't live without, or perhaps you particularly fancy one of their hairstyle options. (And, hey, with as long as you're likely to be stuck with the character, it had best have a look you like!) I have a fondness for Trolls, myself -- though I think that may be just a way of rooting for the underdog, with the Troll's less appealing racials. (If I were thinking practically, how could I turn away from the immensely helpful racial skills the Undead have?) So, tell us -- do you have a favorite, and why?

Garst from Stonemaul has a really interesting question on the forums: where can a lore newbie go first for information?

Recently, I've been trying to get more and more into the lore of Azeroth-- instances especially are much more fun to play when you know exactly who you're fighting and why they're doing what they're doing. In the thread, Neth recommends a few books-- Day of the Dragon, Lord of the Clans, and The Last Guardian, and I agree with her in recommending scanning through (it's long and sometimes boring) the timeline of the WoW universe over on the website. For all of my interest in it, the only thing I've really done outside of the game is go back and replay Warcraft III (or just watch a few cinematics from it). Both Wikipedia and WoW Wiki have lots of good lore info. And one thing Neth doesn't mention is that there's lots of lore inside the game itself. Don't laugh, but especially in Scarlet Monastery and Scholomance, reading through a lot of the books laying around will give a really good background on what's happening in Azeroth.

You're laughing, aren't you? Ok, well, a lot of players may just say "lore lol," but believe me when I say that giving the history a read definitely fills out the game a little bit, and shows you even more deeply the care Blizzard has taken in putting this universe together. Wielding Ashkandi is fun, but it's even moreso when you know who that sword used to belong to.

You might remember the Chinese Coke ad that featured the band S.H.E. as World of Warcraft characters-- it showed up here on the site a while back. Apparently that ad campaign was so successful, they're doing it again, and this time the Orc that attacked in the first ad returns with friends-- a Troll and a pretty well-done Tauren. Get it? "Well-done Tauren"?

This is the first in a series of levelling guides, aimed at new and experienced players as an answer to the eternal question "Where do I go next?". It's aimed at a questing player who will mainly play solo, although people levelling with buddies will find much of it relevant.

Levels 1-5

This is the most straightforward stage of the game. At level 1 you arrive in a newbie zone, complete with everything you will need for the next five levels or so. The zones are dependent on your race:

While out hunting with my undead rogue on the WoW Insider server today, I came across a Night Elf Warrior, several levels higher than me, in the process of ganking a lowly level 10 Priest, and his friend, who had already fallen. They had put up a good fight, taking about half the warrior's health, but the fight was almost over when I decided to step in at the last minute to see if I could do any good.

I figured that, even with half his health, he would take me down as well without much trouble, but to my surprise, I got a couple of lucky criticals in, and with the help of a handy health potion, actually brought him down. I can't tell you how richly satisfying that kill was was, and it got me to wondering...

Have you ever had any PvP moments in the game that were memorable for one reason or another? Ones that made you want to stand up & cheer, or ones so embarrassi! ng (like being killed by a rogue 10 levels lower than you) that you wanted to cringe? Let us hear about 'em; everybody loves a good adventure story...or a good tragedy.

Do racial abilities play a part in choosing your race?  Does the home city factor into your choice? Or does it come down to pure aesthetics when you are choosing?

I know some races offer preferential abilities for certain classes, for example; gnomes gain a 5% bonus to intellect, which is desirable for mages and warlocks.  Orcs on the other hand, gain a passive pet bonus and an active melee talent, more suited to hunters and warriors, in my opinion.

Perhaps the choice of faces or skin color plays a part? Maybe it is the wicked hair choices offered to the undead that draws your eye...

Which race do you prefer? What plays a factor in your choice?

[Edit: Thx Brandon for the spelling correction :) ]

Looks like that World of Warcraft cow has a lot of milk in her. Blizzard and Simon and Schuster will publish a WoW novel in Januaury 2006. The book is being written by Keith R.A. DeCandido, a writer who has penned Star Trek, Andromeda and Buffy the Vampire Slayer novel books.

The plot will center on the Horde's Thrall and the Alliance's Jaina Proudmore attempting to avert all-out war between their respective sides, and will lead Jaina to an "encounter with a legendary, long-lost wizard" -- we're guessing Medivh, who made his appearance in the original Warcraft game that started all this madness back in the early '90's. Who knew orcs would be so popular?