As quite possibly the whitest man alive, I feel compelled to tell you about a new documentary called Why We Laugh: Black Comedians on Black Comedy. The film will be produced and directed by stand-up comic Darryl Littleton and Robert Townsend (director of the brilliant satire on the black experience in Hollywood -- Hollywood Shuffle). The film is inspired by Littleton's book Black Comedians on Black Comedy: How African-Americans Taught Us to Laugh, which you can pick up at Amazon here. The film will contain "archival clips, reenactments depicting the evolution of black comedy, and interviews with comedians and social critics." Sounds like it could be both informative and very, very funny.

Variety reports that the filmmakers have already done interviews with comedians like D.L. Hughley (co-star of the thankfully canceled Studio 60), the Wayans brothers (stars of films like White Chicks and Little Man -- neither of which I'd imagine will be discussed in the documentary), Paul Mooney (comedy legend who did those hilarious "Ask A Black Dude" and "Negrodamus" bits on Chappelle's Show), Tommy Davidson (of In Living Color and the shamefully underrated Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls), character actor Reynaldo Ray, Marla Gibbs (from The Jeffersons and 227), Eddie Griffin (star of the very funny Undercover Brother), and stand-up comedian Katt Williams. Representing the social and political commentary side, there will be discussions with Cornel West, Michael Eric Dyson, Russell Simmons, and Stanley Crouch. I sure hope they can swing an interview with the great Spike Lee, I could listen to that guy discuss anything all day, and he seems an ideal speaker for the project. There are no release details yet for the film.

Just a few days ago I shared a report from Twitchfilm, and in that report it was stated that Fox was planning to "tame" their video game adaptation Hitman. Further, we also heard that director Xavier Gens had been removed from the editing process. Well, either the earlier reports were false or there's been a change of mind over at Fox, because the Hollywood Reporter blog has an update for us...

"A source close to the project and a Fox rep both confirmed that director Xavier Gens is still on board, and the movie will absolutely come out with an R rating. Sources say it will most likely be a "hard R," in fact," is what we're being told. Twitchfilm responds with much skepticism: "If Gens is still in control why was an outside 'consultant' brought in to go over the edit of the film at all, and which of the two actually has more power considering that Gens is currently not even on this continent while [ film editor Nicholas] De Toth is working away?"

So here's what I'm guessing, not that any of this matters one whit: The R rating was always a certainty, but Fox probably had other "creative differences" with their young director. All I care about is this: Does Hitman kick ass? The early marketing push is certainly slick enough, but I've been burned on enough video game movies by now. Guess we'll find out what's up when the flick hits on November 21.

You thought that with all the love we've been throwing at Austin's Fantastic Fest we'd probably forget all about good ol' L.A. Screamfest. Not with me on horror watch! The event runs from October 12 to 20, and if you happen to be located anywhere near the legendary Mann's Chinese Theater -- you just might want to duck inside to see what sort of murderous mayhem is going on.

And the Screamfest looks to be starting off on the right foot this year: Last night's opening night film was George A. Romero's Diary of the Dead! After much praise from the audiences at Toronto and Fantastic Fest, the master's latest zombie opus will hit the west coast with much excitement and gore. And the fun doesn't stop there. The festival will also offer Robert Rodriguez's director's cut of Planet Terror (which is awesome) and a 25th Anniversary screening (and cast reunion) of Friday the 13th Part 3. Yes, in 3-D!

Attendees will also get to check out the long-awaited DVDquel Return to House on Haunted Hill, a screening of the great-looking 30 Days of Night (and the video prequels Blood Trails), David Arquette's festival fave The Tripper, and a variety of genre titles of various shapes, sizes and nationalities. Of the Screamfest flicks we've seen, we've already given a strong seal of approval on the quiet but creepy Alone, the robust zest of Wrong Turn 2, the Pakistani lunacy known as Hell's Ground, , the freakishly ferocious Inside, and the apocalyptic awesomeness that is The Signal. Plus I keep hearing that Shrooms is pretty amusing, Buried Alive is gruesome, and Storm Warning is really solid.

Last week I was rather formal with my inaugural installment of "The Exhibitionist." So, now, let me introduce it properly: this is a new column devoted to movie theaters and why they're still worth your time and money. This is also a place to discuss the movie-going experience, with detailed stories and observations, in addition to being a discussion of the theater industry. Sometimes it will be a rant about what needs changing; other times it will be a recognition of great ideas already in place -- such as last week's comparative look at two examples of incentive opportunities. Hopefully "The Exhibitionist" will also generate more discussion from you, the reader; feel free to tell me what needs to be examined or why you think my suggestions are bad by using this as your own outlet for better solutions.

Now that I've gotten that out of the way, let me get to the topic you all seem to be most interested in: movie theater etiquette. Everyone has their complaints about why the movie-going experience is so terrible these days and about how much of it has to do with the behavior of the rest of the audience. But I don't need to go into a list of things that are wrong about our fellow moviegoers. Nor do I need to list the proper etiquette that should be followed when one goes to the movies. Instead, I'd like to offer up the notion that this etiquette stuff is a bunch of baloney. Personally I think many of our complaints are unfounded and worthless.

First of all, the things we complain about are for the most part nothing new. Take the problem with talkers, for instance. I asked a number of people this week about the earliest experience they had with such an annoyance, and plenty responses included incidents that occurred as early as the ' 60s. And I'm sure that's only because I didn't talk to people old enough to relate anything prior to that time. One person did tip me off to an example in print: In Renata Adler's review of 2001: A Space Odyssey for the New York Times, she pointed out that, "the uncompromising slowness of the movie makes it hard to sit through without talking-and people on all sides when I saw it were talking almost throughout the film. Very annoying."

As I pointed out in my Poltergeist review, I didn't watch much horror as a boy. That's probably a good thing, as even the non-horror flicks I enjoyed often scared the bejesus out of me. You kids today don't know how lucky you have it with your wussy Shreks and your lamewad Pikachus! Children of the 1980s are still in therapy over what Hollywood deemed "family films" back then. The following non-horror mind-screws should prove my point.

Return to Oz (1985)

In high school, I brought Return to Oz to a Halloween movie marathon. I hadn't seen it since I was a kid. Everyone scoffed. "A Wizard of Oz sequel? That's supposed to scare us?" I didn't hear a lot of mockery after the movie started. In fact, nobody said a word until about halfway through, when a friend of mine whispered "Can we please turn this off?" I'm not sure who thought this movie was appropriate for children. It gave me nightmares for nearly a decade.

Dorothy finds a key with an Oz symbol on it, shows it to Auntie Em and Uncle Henry as proof that Oz exists, and is sent to an insane asylum! An evil insane asylum where they give our young heroine electro-shock therapy! That's how this "childrens' film" starts! Once Dorothy gets to Oz, it's a speeding night train of horrors. How about that Nome King? Good LORD! Winged monkeys aren't scary enough anymore, let's give the kids The Wheelers -- sadistic shrieking psychopaths with roller skates instead of hands and feet! Kids today won't be satisfied with just a standard wicked witch, let's really ramp that up too, and ruin their lives! The sequence with the witch's cabinets full of human heads easily rivals anything in the Nightmare on Elm Street series for sheer terror. "Dorothy Gaaaaaale!!!!"

Even the heroes are horrifying! Jack Pumpkinhead? A hybrid stick n' pumpkin creature who calls Dorothy "Mother"? That's your good guy? Not cool, Return to Oz. Not cool.

The Neverending Story (1984)

Along the same lines as Return to Oz, The Neverending Story feels way too dark, weird, and just...wrong to be a kids' movie. I feel my eyes welling up now remembering Atreyu's horse slowly sinking into quicksand and dying. I can't even talk about the Gmork, that big wolfy vampire thing. And a storm called "The Nothing?" Sweet fancy Moses! Also, again, the heroes should not be scarier than the villains! The racing snail? The Rockbiter? That bat-dude? And Falkor? A big flying dog/dragon mutation with disgusting scaly eggs on his skin? We were supposed to root for this hellacious beast?

Another scream-inducing aspect -- one of the worst theme songs in all of 80's film. And that's saying a whole lot!

If you think about it, movies are kind of like ghosts; they can fade from our view, disappear from our sight, and yet still linger in the air like an unexpected chill or lurch from their graves clutching at our memories and minds. That's what happened with Carnival of Souls, a 1962 black-and-white horror film that was made by director "Herk" Harvey and a like-minded group of first-time, last-time film makers taking a break from their day jobs at Centron, a studio devoted to industrial films and educational shorts. Carnival of Souls played a few drive-ins at the time of its release, but truly found an audience as late-night re-run material, popping up in the wee small hours of the morning to haunt and tease viewers with its slow, dreamlike sense of isolation, knockout cinematography, eerie score and the ripe and vital power of the lead performance from Candace Hilligoss. David Lynch and George A. Romero both cite Carnival of Souls as an influence on their work, but Carnival of Souls isn't just influential; it's worth seeing on its own as a very different kind of horror film, one that works as a dream-like slow poison as opposed to the short sharp shocks of modern horror films.

Carnival of Souls begins like a '50s youth-gone-wild film, as a group of joy riders careen down a dusty road; when one of the cars goes off a bridge, though, the fun is over. Mary (Hilligoss) staggers from the river muck like Ophelia saved from drowning, dirty and dazed; we follow her as she goes back to her life, working as a church organist in a small Kansas town. She's taking a job in Salt Lake City, and drives there with a faintly desperate air of aspiration in her gaze; she seems desperate for a new start. But her journey's haunted and troubled; faces materialize in the darkness, and a bizarre pavilion manifests itself out of the flat heartland, calling to her. She takes a room in a boarding house, trying to settle in and fending off the attentions of her boozy, woozy neighbor. But Mary's every effort begins to unravel; she's still followed by specters, troubled when a simple shopping trip descends into a nightmare where no one can see her, drawn over and over to the striking and spooky 'fun fair' she drove past on her way to town. The ultimate revelation of Mary's fate isn't shocking ... but the way Carnival of Souls reaches that destination is full of bizarre visions and troubling sights.

300 fans (and if the Cinematical reader comments are any indication, that would be all of you), take note. Variety is reporting that much of the creative team behind that "abs n' stabs" action extravaganza is reuniting for a new film called The Last Photograph. Photograph is based on an original idea by 300 director Zack Snyder, and is billed as a drama about "a photograph that becomes the catalyst for a journey two men undertake through war-torn Afghanistan." 300 co-screenwriter Kurt Johnstad will write the film for Snyder to possibly direct. The producers of the film intend to develop the film and then put it up for auction.

Reading between the lines of the Variety article, it seems like Snyder wants to direct the project, but doesn't know if he'll have time. And he doesn't know if he'll have time because he's involved with, like, everything! He's currently shooting the highly anticipated Watchmen (check out an update from Snyder on the film's progress here). He intends to direct an adaptation of Ray Bradbury's The Illustrated Man (read more about that project here). He may direct Army of the Dead, a "zombies in Vegas" flick you can learn more about right here. And he's co-writing and might direct an action fantasy film called Sucker Punch (which you can read more about here). Though I admired the look of the film, I was no fan of 300. On the other hand, I really loved Snyder's remake of Dawn of the Dead. So consider me cautiously optimistic about all the Snyder in our future.

Good ol' Al Gore has some such a very long way. After being Bill Clinton's Vice President, he "lost" to George Dubya Bush in his own Presidential bid and slipped off the radar. Who would have ever imagined that a few years later, he'd make waves with a Power Point presentation-turned-super-popular documentary called An Inconvenient Truth, win an Emmy, and Oscar, and now, the Nobel Peace Prize. Yes folks, The Age reports that his Nobel nomination came through with a co-win that he shares with IPCC chairman Dr. Rajendra Pachauri.

He is, of course, "deeply honored" to win the $1.5 million prize, and will be giving his share to the Alliance for Climate Protection, which is a non-profit organization he founded last year. Gore says: "We face a true planetary emergency. The climate crisis is not a political issue, it is a moral and spiritual challenge to all of humanity. It is also our greatest opportunity to lift global consciousness to a higher level."

Not everyone agrees, and Australian Age includes a rather amusing run-down of their own country's political responses. Prime Minister, John Howard refused to watch the documentary and wouldn't take policy advice from films. Industry Minister Ian Macfarlane said: "There are three places I do not go for advice on climate change," and proceeded to list the Labor Party of Australia, the movies, and "unsuccessful candidates for the US presidency." Obviously, not everyone shares their opinion, and it's pretty impressive to see continued recognition coming from one small film. So, how long will it take for the next round of presidential hopeful buzz to fade, or will this actually convince him to try again?

After running around for what seemed like forever today, I finally arrived home to the Transformers two-disc special edition lying on my desk. I had missed the Fed Ex guy all week long, but someone was finally home today to receive the package and now I'll have to devour the movie (for the second time), as well as all the nifty special features so that I can provide you readers with a sweet DVD review come early next week. In the meantime, I've provided a little gallery below with crappy pics (what can I say -- I'm a writer, not a photographer) of the DVD -- front and back -- and the inside sleeve ... that fell out as I opened it. But in case you're wondering ... yes, I'm getting a new digital camera for Christmas. No, actually, in case you're wondering, here is what comes with the two-disc set:

Disc 1

• Commentary from Michael Bay

Disc 2

• Our World: Explore the world of Transformers through interviews with the cast and crew, stunt training footage, and exclusive access to the on-set locations.
• Their World: Learn more about the Autobots and Decepticons with exclusive access to production design, military advisors, and digital special effects.
• More Than Meets The Eye: An in-debth featurette on the making of the Skorponok Desert Attack scene and concept boards.

Added bonus: Peter Cullen just announced at a press conference that he believes there will be two more Transformers films, and he is attached to voice Optimus Prime. The gallery is below, the DVD comes out on Tuesday and the first sequel is already in the works. Enjoy.

What do films like Serpico, Forrest Gump and Batman have in common? Like the trailers we're looking at this week, they place the main character's name right in the title, letting you know immediately who the film is about. What's in a name? Let me show you...

Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins
Martin Lawrence stars as a successful talk show host who brings his fiance to meet the family from whom he has spent years trying to distance himself. There won't be any surprises here for members of Lawrence's fan base. The trailer consists of the type of broad slapstick humor he is known for, with one of the big jokes being that he's forced to wear a ridiculous looking pair of pants. Suffice it to say, it doesn't work for me. I asked myself what the heck Michael Clarke Duncan was doing in this mess, then I realized James Earl Jones was in it too, and suddenly the world just didn't make sense anymore.

Mama's Boy
OK, "Mama's Boy" isn't exactly the character's name, but this new comedy that stars John Heder looks like it could be fun, and it seems like a return to Napolean Dynamite country. Heder plays a twenty-nine year old geek who is perfectly happy to still be living with his mother, who is played by Diane Keaton, but mom has a new boyfriend and the titular Mama's Boy is cramping her style. Anna Faris also stars as the object of Heder's characters affections. The scene in which Keaton gushes to the point of embarrassment because her son has finally brought a woman home was particularly memorable. Looking forward to this one.

At one time, before Brandon Routh put on his best Superman, Nicholas Cage was looking to don the tights. While it may seem weird, there was just something about it that appealed to me. Now, while he isn't getting to be a world-famous superhero, Cage will be throwing on a pair of tights, or some other form of spandex. The Hollywood Reporter has posted that the actor is in talks to star in an upcoming indie drama called The Wrestler, which will come to us from Darren Aronofsky's Protozoa Pictures.

It's not some sporty tale of school wrestlers and their coach, but rather, and wonderfully, the world of pro wrestling. Cage will, hopefully, star as "a 1980s-era star pro wrestler who has become a burnt-out shell of his former self. After he has a heart attack during a small-time match, a doctor tells him he could die if he fights again." So, in the attempts to start a new life, he gets a job at a much-less-exciting deli, and gets sweet on an aging stripper and her son. "But the prospect of a rematch with his old nemesis the Ayatollah proves too tempting to resist, even if it means risking his life."

All of my little-kid WWF (pre-WWE) memories are bubbling up at the thought of this! Even though I think Cage would probably be better suited to something like the Mouth of the South Jimmy Hart, I'll bite. Now, I can only hope that this is filled with cameos from all those wrestlers of yester-year. Some, like Andre the Giant and the Von Erich clan, are no longer with us, but what about a little Jesse The Body Ventura, Ric Flair, Hulk Hogan, Hillbilly Jim, Jake The Snake Roberts, Macho Man Randy Savage, King Kong Bundy, and on, and on, and on!

The good news: We are still in fact giving away a trip for two to India to the winner of last week's Darjeeling Limited contest. The bad news: Contrary to what some ill-informed stooge (me) stated in last week's post ("Winner will be announced Friday, October 11 12 @ 4:00 PM EST), we are still in the process of confirming our winner and will most likely not announce his or her name (and caption) until next Friday. As the expression goes, with free trips to India for photo caption contests comes all sorts of legal technicalities the average stooge doesn't take into account. But thanks to the thousand-plus of you who entered, we were rooting for you.

So onward with more prizes... But following up a free trip to India is hard. So below please find a photo of "two hot chicks on a motorcycle." You may also know them as Rose McGowan (soon to be Mrs. Robert Rodriguez) and Marley Shelton, stars of Rodriguez's 1973 2007 zombie movie Planet Terror, released in theaters as one-half of Grindhouse. Writers of our favorite caption will win a framed poster signed by Rodriguez, as well as the DVD and an action figure (of McGowan, not Rodriguez). Two runners up will win the DVD and action figure.
Good luck!

Read the official rules for this contest

As you may have heard, there's another Rambo sequel coming January 25th, starring and co-written/directed by Sylvester Stallone. IMDb lists a variety of considered titles for the movie, including Rambo IV: End of Peace (eh), Rambo IV: Holy War (it rhymes), and Rambo IV: Pearl of the Cobra (hilarious). Most recently it was called Rambo IV: In the Serpent's Eye -- obviously the greatest title in action movie history -- but maybe that sounded a bit too direct-to-DVD. So they changed it again. Following the success of Rocky Balboa (which I absolutely loved), the title switched to John Rambo. I'm all about that simple name title -- it brings a touch of restraint and class to a movie I'm fairly certain will have neither. "This January...spend Martin Luther King Day with an old friend...John Rambo." Perfect. Done. But no. They've scrapped the title yet again!

Now the movie is called Rambo to Hell and Back. I agree with Josh over at Cinema Blend that the title doesn't really work without a colon. Rambo to Hell and Back just isn't a complete thought. Titles like Ernest to Camp or Ernest to Jail don't make sense, you have to put a verb in there somewhere. I guess they're not using the word "Goes" (as in Rambo Goes to Hell and Back) because it would be to close to Jason Goes To Hell: The Final Friday (which, it is worth pointing out, was not the final Friday). But how about something like Rambo Rocks It to Hell and Back? Or Rambo Blows Dudes' Heads Up All the Way to Hell and Back? Too long? Not to worry, it easily abbreviates to RBDHUATWTHAB. Oh well. Never mind that Stallone looks like a 'roided up Liza Minnelli in the movie. No matter what they call it, all the Serpents, Cobras, and Holy Wars in the world couldn't keep me from seeing this film. I'd...to hell and back in order to see the thing.

UPDATE: Sly Stallone says he's staying with John Rambo after folks bashed this new title. Read all about it over on AICN.

Elizabeth: The Golden Age reunites director Shekhar Kapur and Cate Blanchett in the follow-up to the 1998 film Elizabeth, which told of the early years of Queen Elizabeth I. The earlier film deconstructed the earlier history of Elizabeth I, when she ascended to the throne following the death of her half-sister, Mary Tudor, aka Bloody Mary. The daughter of Henry VIII and Anne Boleyn (who was beheaded when Elizabeth was three), Elizabeth had been raised a Protestant in the Church of England. Mary Tudor, a devout Catholic, had been married to Philip II of Spain, which made him, until Mary's death, the Prince Consort of England.

Elizabeth: The Golden Age picks up some years after Elizabeth left off, with the Protestant Elizabeth now firmly in control of the British crown. Once again, Elizabeth faces enemies and insurgency, this time from her Catholic cousin, Mary, Queen of Scots (Samantha Morton), and her former brother-in-law Philip II (Jordi Molla), who comes at odds with his former sister-in-law over both religion and her approval of the capture of Spanish treasure ships. The Inquisition is in full force in Spain, and the Catholic Philip regards Elizabeth as a heretic and whore, believing that God wants him to bring her down and bring England under the firm hand of the Catholic Church and the Inquisition. Once again, Geoffrey Rush is by Blanchett's side as Francis Walsingham, Elizabeth's spymaster and adviser, whose intelligence about a plot against Elizabeth saves the queen's life, even as it sets in motion a war with Spain that could spell the end of her reign.

Because there can never be enough thrillers, and there's no point waiting for the book to come out before you want to adapt it, we've got word of the next upcoming book that's already been picked up for feature treatment. The Hollywood Reporter has posted that Warner Brothers nabbed the movie rights to an upcoming book by Olen Steinhauer, a two-time Edgar Award nominee, called The Tourist. Only in "early manuscript form," it's said to be similar to John le Carre and Graham Greene, and it focuses on the typical fare of the spy who is falsely accused of murder and risks everything to clear his name.

The producers for this little project will be none other than Smoke House's George Clooney and Grant Heslov. The company has been pretty busy lately, getting projects out. There is Leatherheads, the Clooney-directed film that has just hit post, White Jazz, the James Ellroy adaptation that's being tackled by Joe Carnahan, and they're also developing an adaptation of Farragut North, a play by Beau Willimon. Considering the fact that Clooney sometimes helms these productions, I wonder if this will be a cut-and-dry production gig, or if he'll get extra-involved. Whatever the case, we've got to wait for both the book and the screenplay to be written before anything else.