Totem Talk talks about totems this week, in a stunning and entirely unexpected turn of events that no one could possibly have forseen even if said non forseeing types were actually Farseer Nobundo himself. Well, okay, he probably could have seen this coming. Matthew Rossi once again apologizes for the incoherence of the introductory paragraph. He didn't see this coming.

Okay, so you have decided to roll a new shaman. You start off in the starting area, fresh faced and ready to run around dropping totems only to discover you haven't got one yet. Confused, you run around with a mace hitting things until you reach level four, when the questgivers suddenly remember Oh, right, this class is supposed to be about dropping pointed, decorative sticks into the ground and you get your first totem quest.

The totem quests are a fun, sometimes easy, sometimes challenging way for a new shaman to get a handle on the class. Well, I think they're fun, anyway. Except that water one, that one is hard for a horde to pull off... well, to be fair it's not much easier for alliance, really. As you might expect, horde and alliance shamans have different questgivers and as such different quests in (mostly) different zones. The horde ones require a bit more travel than the alliance ones, which were put in for the expansion and, in my opinion, are slightly better in their design and play. But that's to be expected as Blizzard put the lessons they'd learned designing the original quests into play for the new ones.

Anyway, we'll talk about the horde quests first, as is fitting for horde shamans have been around longer.

If you may recall, back in the ancient days of yore two weeks ago, Know Your Lore did a report on the history of the trolls and promised to get to Zul'jin the following week. Then Know Your Lore got strep throat, which is a ridiculous thing to get at the age of 24. So I broke my promise and humbly apologize. Here is a monkey befriending a kitten.

Who: Zul'jin.

What: Leader of the Forest Trolls.

History: As stated in the previous article, all trolls came from one original species, but divided into several sub-groups based on their values. After they fought and lost a war with the night elves and the world got Sundered, they were tossed around to all different places. The forest trolls of the Amani Empire were sent back to northern Lordaeron, where they managed to rebuild a pretty extensive empire. Then the silly night elves showed up again, in the form of the arcane-addicted high elves, who put up magical runestones and built their city on sacred troll land.

The trolls attacked a couple of times, but were scared off by the arcane magic. There was an uneasy stalemate for several thousand years, but one day, the trolls launched their full forces at the elves. The elves called upon the humans of Arathor for help and agreed to teach them the secrets of magic. The humans and the elves routed the trolls in the Alterac Mountains, and the Amani Empire was beaten into submission. (Yes, I know I'm repeating myself but it's important, because ...) This is where Zul'jin comes in.

Woo, Zul'Aman is coming. Another dang troll instance. Another fight against my brothers and sisters. Another slog through endless high priests and animal aspects. Another raid of "Sorry there, I thought you were one of the mobs so I was trying to fight you." We've killed so many trolls now, I think it's about time we know what we've been fighting.

Troll lore is extremely interesting, but it's also ridiculously confusing. I mean, how many troll tribes have we launched genocides against by now? How are all these trolls related, anyway? Do any trolls actually get along with other trolls? Read on, and we'll try to sort through some of the muddy tangles of troll history. Next week we'll actually get to Zul'jin himself, who was originally the focus of this article before it got horrendously long.

Who: Trolls!

What: Trolls!

History: First, before this gets too confusing, let's do a basic summary of the sort of trolls you're going to run into in WoW, so you can connect the names with the in-game models. Jungle trolls are the skinny dudes in the Temple of Atal'hakkar, Stranglethorn Vale, Zul'Gurub, and Darkshore. The Darkspear trolls -- the playable race of trolls -- are also jungle trolls. Forest trolls include the troll enemies in Hinterlands, LBRS, Ghostlands, and Eastern Plaguelands, and the Horde-friendly Revantusk trolls. Ice trolls are found in Northrend and Dun Morogh, and sand trolls are the guys in Zul'Farrak. A basic troll identification guide is skin color. Forest trolls are green, jungle trolls are blue/purple, ice trolls are white/light blue, and sand trolls are beige. An excellent guide to troll looks can be found here. What? We're not racist.

There's been a controversy brewing on my realm forums over whether something is an exploit, a bug, or merely a creative use of game mechanics, so I thought I'd take the question (and the strategy) to the wider world of WoW blogs.

Basically, Horde guilds across several realms have discovered that by using a troll priest on the Al'ar fight, you can take off 20 percent of the boss's health in Phase 2. It appears that the troll priest racial ability Hex of Weakness, which decreases healing done to the target by 20 percent, makes Al'ar resurrect from his Phase One "death" with only 80 percent of his maximum health. There have been a few posts about this on Raids and Dungeons and Bosskillers, but it doesn't appear that it's a widely used strategy.

Vendetta, the guild on my realm that used this strategy for their first kill, said they don't believe it's an exploit, and that they felt they could kill Al'ar without using it. "Until Blizzard says otherwise on Raids and Dungeons or contacts us in-game, it's working as intended because the Rising Phoenix ability is a heal effect," a guild member said. Other people have compared it to using Divine Intervention on Razorgore, which was deemed an exploit, and the bugs that caused Vashj to lose 20 percent of her health before 2.1, which were not.

So, raiders of the world, what would you call this? A clever use of Hex of Weakness as intended, or an exploitation of a bug that classifies Rising Phoenix as healing? And, more generally, if a guild takes advantage of an odd mechanism in a fight that hasn't been classified as a bug by Blizzard, is it exploiting or just being smart?

There are some things in WoW that are blindingly obvious, and yet you never realize them until someone points them out. Apolos of Norgannon brings up one of these topics when he asks the WoW General Forums, "Why do dwarves have Scottish accents?"

I had never actually noticed that before, although I'd realized that the trolls (Jamaican) and the draenei (Russian) both have accents that are analogous to nationalities on Earth. Drysc said that since there's no such place as Scotland in Azeroth, the dwarven accent is clearly Dwarven and not Scottish, which seems to be circular reasoning to me. Other people point out that the dwarves live in Loch Modan and have a Nessy swimming around, and postulate that since fantasy dwarves usually have Scottish trappings for some reason, this has carried over to WoW.

Aside from trolls, dwarves and draenei, the rest of the races of Azeroth don't seem to have clear accents. The gnomes sound bright and enterprising, the blood elves sound like they would have laughed at you for playing video games in high school, and most of the Horde sounds like they smoked two packs a day ever since arriving in Kalimdor. Unfortunately, no one seems to have a New York accent, which seems like it would be an awesome thing for, say, the undead.

Why do dwarves have Scottish accents? Can you place the voices of any of the other races of Azeroth, or are they just generic fantasy voices?

Is this fellow for real? From all indications, he is.

Juffowup,the author of this blog, has leveled a Troll hunter from 1-60 completely naked. Apparently he has been doing this for a while, but I didn't notice his exploits until the guys at Paladin Sucks linked to his blog. While the naked Troll's spelling, grammar and site design leave a little to be desired (and he seems to love using the adult language, so if that offends, avoid his blog), his determination to hit 60 with a naked toon is interesting. Apparently he accomplished some of his naked leveling on the Mal'Ganis server, but not all of it...he transferred to the server after rather rudely leaving his last realm.

I am not suggesting you read the entire write up on his blog, heck, I could barely get through the first few posts, but this is definitely worth a look from the morbid curiosity department. At the very least you could chime in with an overpowered hunter argument, but I guess with persistence you could do this with any class. Has anyone crossed paths with Jeffowup? What do you guys think? WoW geek of the year material here? It would be nice to give Longarms some competition.

You've got to have a favorite. Maybe they have a racial you just can't live without, or perhaps you particularly fancy one of their hairstyle options. (And, hey, with as long as you're likely to be stuck with the character, it had best have a look you like!) I have a fondness for Trolls, myself -- though I think that may be just a way of rooting for the underdog, with the Troll's less appealing racials. (If I were thinking practically, how could I turn away from the immensely helpful racial skills the Undead have?) So, tell us -- do you have a favorite, and why?

You might remember the Chinese Coke ad that featured the band S.H.E. as World of Warcraft characters-- it showed up here on the site a while back. Apparently that ad campaign was so successful, they're doing it again, and this time the Orc that attacked in the first ad returns with friends-- a Troll and a pretty well-done Tauren. Get it? "Well-done Tauren"?

Is it a joke, or a guild leader's dream? This ad appeared on Chicago's Craiglist classifeds in the "women seeking men" section.

Someone out there is a 60 Troll Priest looking for a troll or orc "Warrior, Rogue, or Shaman to fight in honor for Thrall in the lands of Azeroth." Apparently her parents wouldn't approve of a cow or corpse. But she does claim to have a black war raptor, and has hobbies like disenchanting "useless garments."

So if "slaying of self-righteous paladins and squishy gnomes" is your thing, drop the anonymous email a note. She might just be making fun of you-- or it might be Epic (or even Legendary) love (that's a +12 spirit drop!).

Just in case Craigslist thinks it's a joke and deletes the ad, I've reprinted it in full after the jump.

Blizzard's opened a section of their website detailing the history of the Troll race.  Initially, I assumed it was just fluff, but it really goes into an immense amount of detail on the story behind the trolls, and makes for an interesting read.  However, I don't know much about the lore behind the trolls so the story's all new to me - though it may not be to others.  Any lore hawks out there who can let us know if this is consistent with past lore?  With the troubles with the Draenei lore, I'd be curious to know how this story sounds to those of you in the know. 

This is the first in a series of levelling guides, aimed at new and experienced players as an answer to the eternal question "Where do I go next?". It's aimed at a questing player who will mainly play solo, although people levelling with buddies will find much of it relevant.

Levels 1-5

This is the most straightforward stage of the game. At level 1 you arrive in a newbie zone, complete with everything you will need for the next five levels or so. The zones are dependent on your race:

Crafting Worlds' latest video production is a great little propaganda piece for the Horde in the style of Apple's "Switch" ads. If you sympathise with the paladin--especially as a result of the upcoming changes--maybe now's the time to switch and experience the joy of Frost Shock for yourself!

On a more serious note, I switched from Alliance to Horde pretty soon after starting to play WoW, and now I play both and get to see the entire game.
 Each has its advantages and disadvantages--I love the Horde scenery and the Tauren concept, but it's fun being a Dwarf too. Playing a number of characters means I hit 60 more slowly, but I do experience a lot along the way.

[via Wonderland]