Super Skank Wednesday: Charm School for the men of I Love New York
So no I Love Money on Sunday night? Wha-what? Pshaw! How can I do my awesome picture books without a new episode?
Okay enough complaining. After the jump, I'm going to discuss a show that doesn't exist (yet) in the VH1 skanktastic line-up: Charm School: The Men of I Love New York. I've got a list of my fantasy cast.
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Super Skank Wednesday: Megan Hausermann Vs. Sister Patterson - VIDEO
I was left rather disappointed with I Love Money this week. Another one of my "Fantasy I Love Money" picks went home leaving me with a whopping 140 points. And I was planning on writing a big tribute to Megan's demise but NO! She's still there.
I was so annoyed with ILM that I started watching New York Goes to Hollywood again. The show still reeks of artifice with New York going to a nail salon to study Japanese culture or thinking "break a leg" means that the person wants to do her physical harm. However, by the fourth episode, Sister Patterson has entered the scene and is saving the show with her outright rudeness and over-the-top behavior.
So I decided to pit the two women I love to hate against each other for a Vs. piece. This Super Skank Wednesday I give you: Megan Hausermann Vs. Sister Patterson, The Battle of the Hateful Shrews.
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Super Skank Wednesday: 12 Pack's Destruction, A Tale of Hubris
This Wednesday let's do another picture book fairy tale. I'm learning a lot from I Love Money. How about you? After the jump, I have a piece I call "12 Pack's Destruction, A Tale of Hubris." I'm not a betting woman, but I don't think anyone on ILM knows what the term "hubris" means.
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Super Skank Wednesday: The Demise of Rodeo
Today we'll talk about Rodeo who got eliminated from I Love Money this past Sunday. The name. The guns. The bandanas she customized with a Bedazzler. The barbeque sauce.
I'm sad she got kicked off. She certainly could have used that money for some psychiatric evaluations. Let's talk about her demise after the jump. I'm doing another picture book.
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Super Skank Wednesday: More life lessons from celebreality
Today I have some life lessons from celebreality. You readers know how grateful I am to VH1 for the many cautionary tales and moral exemplars it has provided me. I'll give you a few things I learned from I Love Money and New York Goes to Hollywood after the jump.
(And by the way, I think I Want To Work for Diddy might be the sleeper hit of the summer. I included some life lessons from that show, too.)
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Super Skank Wednesday: The insanity of The Entertainer & New York's new show
Today I want to talk about how insane The Entertainer is and whether or not New York Goes to Hollywood will be worth watching.
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VH1 has a sneak peek of New York Goes to Hollywood - VIDEO
Truer words were never spoken. VH1 has posted a sneak peek of their new show New York Goes to Hollywood. The show, which premieres tonight at 10 PM, will follow VH1's reality queen on her journey to become a serious actress. In the series premiere New York hires an assistant, does a bootcamp workout, gets a clip reel together, and performs at a small theatre in front of high-powered managers.
By "high-powered," I mean managers who are friends with executive producers Cris Abrego and Mark Kronin. Or by "high-powered," I mean people VH1 hired to sit in the audience, watch New York perform, and pretend to be managers.
I think the best part is getting to see her read a monologue. She a maid who just wants to catch her 6:30 bus home and not go outside and pick up dog doodoo.
The video is after the jump.
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VH1's reality queen New York wants to do Lifetime movies
Continue reading VH1's reality queen New York wants to do Lifetime movies
Super Skank Wednesday: 12 Pack's master plan, a quaint children's tale
After Sunday night's episode, I am reminded of the classic line from Steinbeck's novel, "The best laid plans of mice and men are often effed up by blondes with huge fake boobs and nasal voices." Or something like that. Or maybe it was from the Robert Burns' poem. But enough of this talk about low brow things like famous novels or poems. Let's get to I Love Money.
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Super Skank Wednesday: The Greatness of Mr. Boston
Today, we'll pay homage the star of I Love Money: Mr. Boston. Who knew this awkward guy from Bean Town would have hotties like Megan Hausermann saying "He's growing on me" and tough guys like White Boy wrapped around his finger.
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Super Skank Wednesday: Brooke Knows Best & I Love Money - VIDEOS
After the jump, I've got some of my favorite I Love Money moments from this weekend and my first impressions of Brooke Knows Best. And I have a special video.
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Brooke Knows Best ... not Hulkster - VIDEO
Her new show, Brooke Knows Best, premieres this Sunday July 13th at 10 p.m. ET / PT. That's right after I Love Money!
I've got a sneak peek at the first episode after the jump...
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Try to keep up ... Kim Kardashian is launching a perfume line
I'll indulge you in a sample, "It has always been a dream of mine to start my own perfume business, since I love to mix fragrances together and come up with new and different scents! I hope you understand my total excitement as I let you, the readers of my blog, become the first to know that I am creating my own fragrance!!!" I love the emboldened words and gratuitous use of exclamation points.
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It's lights, camera, New York this summer - VIDEO
To rev up for the new show, VH1 put together a set of promos that have New York acting as classic Hollywood characters. She plays Dorothy from Wizard of Oz: "Toto, where the f*ck are we?" She plays Marilyn Monroe in that classic scene where the blonde starlet walks over the sidewalk grate. However, New York uses the breeze from the passing subway car to dry her nails and her nether regions. Whatever works, right? Finally, New York plays Forrest Gump and imparts some wisdom about life and chocolates.
The videos are after the jump. All three are stupid and unfunny. And all three prove the New York's new show is going to be a blast. Check it out and let me know what you think.
New York Goes to Hollywood premieres August 4th at 9 p.m. ET on VH1.
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Super Skank Wednesday: The I Love Money casting special
Welcome to Super Skank Wednesday. This is where I celebrate the awesomely skanky people on the following shows: I Love Money, Charm School, New York Goes to Hollywood, and The Surreal Life. Basically, I'll discuss the skankalicious shows that make VH1 the network it is today.
There's been a lull in trashtastic programming lately. I'm stuck watching So You Think You Can Dance (some of the those Latin ballroom costumes are a little slutty) and Secret Diary of a Call Girl (scripted skankiness). I long for VH1 to start their summer of skanktacity. We got a little taste last night with the I Love Money casting special. Check out my review after the jump.
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