Alfie Patten and Baby Maisie - Two Kids in Need of Good Parenting
Teens & tweens, In the news, Media
If seeing baby-faced Alfie Patten, 13, and 15-year-old Chantelle Steadman posing with their newborn baby for a celebrity-style photo spread in the British tabloids were not depressing enough, now as many as eight other boys in their neighborhood have stepped forward to say that they too could be the father of poor little one-week old Maisie. One of the boys is even demanding a DNA test.
Every day as more and more details surface, we begin to see a picture of the kind of moral and family breakdown that robs children like Alfie and Chantelle of the pleasures of an authentic childhood, for the false "freedom" of sex. And while these kids seem to say the right things -- "I know I'm young, but I plan to be a good dad. I think we'll be good parents. I'll have to work extra hard at school." -- there's undoubtedly a disturbing and telling sense of shamelessness in the way their families have permitted them to exploit their predicament for tabloid fame.
Even a cursory read of this dysfunctional soap opera will lead to one glaring deficiency in these kids' lives -- parental supervision! Chantelle was permitted to have boys spend the night at her house, and virtually all of the boys' parents claim that they thought their son was at a "mate's" house, not Chantelle's. With clueless and lazy parents like that, it doesn't take a lot of imagination to wonder what kind of smutty television, movies, video games these kids were ingesting in the hours they spent on their own, which in all likelihood contributed to their sexual activity. In this day and age, protecting our children from an overly and overtly sexualized culture is a full-time job, even in the best of circumstances. Here we see what happens when lax parenting meets a decaying youth culture.
Sadly, this problem is not exclusively to Britain. Nor should we blame poverty (although apparently the families in this particular story live in subsidized public housing and receive public assistance). Being poor is not an excuse for bad parenting. To say so insults the poor and working class and and belies facts: plenty of people, including my own parents, were raised in poorer homes and were taught morality and decency. Common sense and morals are not a factor of income. There simply is no substitute for good parenting and strong families – not even a whole lot of government money or well-intentioned social programs.
Iain Duncan Smith, a former Tory leader and director of the Center for Social Justice in England describes the situation perfectly: "This is a tragic example of the nation's social decline. I don't know about these particular families but too many dysfunctional families in Britain today have children growing up where anything goes. It exemplifies the point we have been making about broken Britain. It's not being accusative, it's about pointing out the complete collapse in some parts of society of any sense of what's right and wrong."
Amen to that!
Facebook is a Lifelong Commitment for Your Kids
Scary Cyber Attacks
Teen Commits Suicide Over MySpace Hoax
A cruel prank leads to terrible tragedy, and murder charges for the perpetrators.
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djayo on SXC
Facebook Group Sends Teacher to Therapy
And the kids who created it were suspended.
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Bubbles on SXC
Fake MySpace Page Destroys Teen's Reputation
A malicious, random attack led this 4.0 student all the way to Dr. Phil in an attempt to clear his name.
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YouTube
Attack Recorded on Cellphone, Posted to Facebook
These middle school students shared their violent video with some online buddies, and wound up suspended.
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smitea on SXC
Online Attacks Spur Real-Life Violence
Two girls attempts to retaliate against a cyberbully led to a street fight.
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SXC
Investigators Posing as Teens Propositioned for Sex
Staff members of the New York Attorney General signed up for Facebook pretending to be teens and were repeatedly asked if they had any "nude pics" to share -- and it gets worse.
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forwardcom on SXC
The Real Threat Might Surprise You
According to a new report, your kids are in greater danger from cyberbullying than they are from online sexual predators.
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ArminH on SXC
Predators Aren't Who You Think
Worried about adults with foul intentions posing as teens online? Chances are they're not the ones hitting your kids up for sex -- but the real culprits are even worse.
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bruno-free on SXC
The popular social-networking site discreetly made a change to its user Terms of Service in early February, according to the blog, The Consumerist. Facebook recently ruled that it has a perpetual license to use anything you post to your own Facebook private page -- even if you decide to terminate your account. As The Consumerist's headline reads: "We Can Do Anything We Want With Your Content Forever."
Pocketbook-Friendly Toy Picks - Envelope, Please
Out of courtesy for your wallet -- and because so many Americans are either already holding a pink slip or, let's face it, desperately trying to avoid one -- w've organized the list of winners to bring you the toys that rate best on our price index (Translation: You can keep some cash in your checking account).
Each toy was evaluated in terms of its quality-price ratio (the cheapest toy might be poorly constructed, while a seemingly expensive toy could last for a decade and, hence, prove its worth). You should also consider what industry insiders call a toy's "play value." A toy with a high play value, for instance, can provide entertainment and educational stimulation during both the initial and subsequent play sessions -- and it'll likely keep your child engaged for years to come.
Here's the list all of us tightwad toy lovers have been waiting for:
Bad Kid-Habits and How You Can Fix Them
Whining
TRY: "I can't understand you when you're talking in that whiny voice. Can you ask again in a different way?" (You have to say this at least 10,000 times before it works.) Hold firm with: "I'm sorry you're upset but the answer is still no."
Zela on SXC
Bad Kid-Habit: Screen-obsession
TRY: "Hey kids, new rule: You can only watch TV [say your rules here]." Follow by posting the new rules on the fridge, which will give you the opportunity tosimply point rather than repeat the rule 100x per day.
TIP: Refer to the Tips on the Bad Kid-Habit Whining slide to cope with what happens immediately after you say this and for the 7-10 days that follow.
Annalog85 on SXC
Bad Kid-Habit: Won't Eat Anything
TRY: "If you eat that broccoli, I will cry! I'll do it! No! Don't eat it!" Follow with hysterical pretend-crying. For some reason our children love to watch us sob over veggies.
TIP: You have to really pour on the drama for this to work.
justinhenry on Flickr
Bad Kid-Habit: Won't Get Ready
TRY: We put a sticker chart by the door, and give stickers (princesses for our Little Princess, smiley faces for our Prince) every time they are ready at the door by 7:45.
TIP: Give a small prize when the chart has 25 stickers on it. Something small. Like stickers.
merfam on Flickr
Bad Kid-Habit: Ignores your requests
TRY: Wait until your child needs something (hungry, thirsty, help with a project) then say, "Sure-could you please just put your clothes in the hamper first? Thanks!"
TIP: Don't repeat requests a million times, because that turns your voice into Background Noise.
Johan Larsson on flickr
Bad Kid-Habit: Won't Go to Bed
TRY: Routine, routine, routine. After reading 1,000 books about this, routine is the common advice-thread. Figure out the sequence of events that works best for
your family and do their bedtime routine the same way at the same time every night. (If you have a great routine that works, will you post it in the comments?)
TIP: If you can incorporate things you say or sing into the routine every night, that's even better (like singing the same songs in the same order). Remember Pavlov?
Robert Crum on flickr
Bad Kid-Habit: Sibling fighting
TRY: "Okay you two are not allowed to play with each other for the next 5 minutes. Please find separate things to do." (Follow up with suggestions so they don't just stare helplessly into the middle distance).
TIP: This tends to make siblings unite against you in their desperate desire to play together. Really make them wait it out.
hyperboreal on flickr
Bad Kid-Habit: Dawdling
TRY: When you need your kids to walk along say "Green Light!" and when you need them to stop say "Red Light!" Add in fun by saying "Purple Light!" and explaining what that means (skipping, hopping, or kids' favorite method of forward-motion: the Gallop).
TIP: This comes in super-handy when kids are about to run too far down the block and you shout RED LIGHT!
bjearwicke on SXC
Bad Kid-Habit: Hitting
TRY: When she gets that "I'm going to hit you" look, prevent her from hitting by saying "no hitting that hurts" and moving out of reach or holding her hands.
TIP: Preventing hitting takes more vigilance but if you can do it, it's easier to correct the behavior rather than reacting once you have been hit and part of you is in parenting mode while part of you is distracted by: "Ow, my eye!"
jmcknight on flickr
Bad Kid-Habit: Clinging
TRY: Cling back. This sounds crazy but worked for me-I tell my 4 year old "Oh my gosh, you are stuck to my butt! Please hang on! Don't fall off!" She laughs like crazy while I try to get dressed and put my makeup on with her hanging on. After a few minutes she's had enough and lets go.
TIP: Finish your coffee first.
Sarah Serendipity on flickr
Daily Cutie - Mischief
What's this adorable one got up his sleeve? Thanks to morrococo for this addition to our Daily Cutie pool.
If you'd like your own picture featured here, simply upload photos into our group Flickr Pool - We'll highlight an image every day. Remember: we're on the lookout for shots with interesting backgrounds, cool angles, or original composition. Be sure to read the intro on our main Flickr page for more information and limit your uploading to 5 photos per day.
LookBook - Image of the Day
Think your baby is the cutest of all? Our answer is a 2.0 style cutie-pie contest. Click on for a collection of the most adorable baby pictures we could find. Want to show off your own? Click here to send us your pictures.
Blushing Babe
Rosy-cheeked babies pull our heart strings every single time. Thanks to robax for such a great shot of this adorable wee one. -- 1/9/2009
robax, Flickr
Snoozin' Stripes
All of these colorful patterns sure don't seem to keep this cute baby awake. Thanks to DtotheV for this glimpse at their precious tyke! -- 1/7/2009
DtotheV, Flickr
Double Lean
We've all been there - trying to get our littlest tykes to sit upright for a photo. These cuties seem to be experiencing a domino effect! Thanks to Naasif and Kim for this adorable photo.
-- 1/6/2009
Naasif and Kim
Face Off
It's either you or me, Elmo. Only one of us gets the spotlight today. Looks like PAC 412's little one doesn't mess around! -- 1/5/2009
PAC 412, Flickr
Little Peanut
Apprehension, Anticipation, Glee. Looks like Greg Gladman accurately captured many expressions of the holiday season. --12/31/08
Santa Cutie
Hearts are aflutter over this little Santa! Thanks to Dhanny for this precious portrait. --12/30/08
Un-Merry Christmas
Don't worry little tot, the holidays are almost over. Thanks to ESnod for giving us a little sympathetic giggle this afternoon. --12/29/08
Christmas Reflections
Amidst ornaments and gifts, this little one is learning the art of a quick peek. Thanks to Shayne Marie Casto for this beautiful photo.
Shayne Marie Casto, Flickr
Baby in the Bubble
This tot artfully photographed by BethLo surely won't bust your bubble. -- 12/23/2008
BethLo, Flickr
Dora the Explorer Grows Up and Gets a Makeover
Dora the Explorer is a spunky, kind-hearted, bilingual kid who spends all of her time outdoors having adventures with her dearly loved friends. Until she grows up, that is. Nickelodeon and Mattel announced their new Dora Explorer Girls line yesterday, marketed to kids 5 and way over. That's right...Dora is now a a tween.
The new Dora, who will be revealed in the fall, lives in the big city and goes to middle school. She still solves mysteries but she's abandoned outdoor adventure for shopping, jewelry and fashion. She's also computer savvy; her new fans -- other tween girls -- will be able to plug into virtual Dora playtime on a new site.
Teen Spots Error on State Writing Test
When high school junior Geoffery Stanford sat down to take his state's standardized writing test last week, little did he know he wasn't just proofreading his own work -- but the test itself. Stanford found a glaring typo on his test missed by the 30 teachers who wrote the test and the hundreds of students who have taken it since. Test writers used the world "omission" instead of "emission" when talking about greenhouse gasses. "I thought, 'Surely they're not talking about leaving out carbon dioxide altogether," said the 17-year-old. "It had to be a mistake."
Yup, said the red-faced Kansas State Department of Education. "This went through all the channels, and the pilot project, and nobody caught it," said a spokesperson.
There are lessons to be learned here. One is that proofreading is never overrated. Another is that even experts make mistakes. Which leads us to a third: If standardized tests are imperfect, which they clearly are, what's the point? It's illogical to count test scores based on a mistake.
Octomom Takes Vow of Chastity, Gets Dropped by Agent
"I can't remember the last time I went on a date," Suleman told the British tabloid The Sun. "Boyfriends? I think I'd have to be extremely selfish. I cannot maintain a social life and be a mother." (Pause: Talk amongst yourselves.)
Octuplets Gallery
A child stands in a bedroom in the home of Angela Suleman, the grandmother of the California octuplets. Nadya Suleman, the mother of the babies who also has six other children, said this week that she is done having children. See More Photos From RadarOnline.com
Stewart Cook, RadarOnline.com
The Southern California woman who gave birth to octuplets on Jan. 26 had the embryos implanted at a Beverly Hills clinic run by a controversial doctor, it was revealed Monday. Here, Dr. Michael Kamrava is shown performing an ultrasound on a pregnant Nadya Suleman in 2006. In addition to the octuplets, Suleman has six other children, ages 2 to 7.
KTLA / AP
Suleman is shown with two of her children in 2006. The single mom told NBC's 'Today' show that she was "fixated" on having children. She said all 14 of her children were conceived through in vitro fertilization with sperm donated by a friend. She said she used the same doctor for all her pregnancies.
KTLA / AP
Suleman looks at an ultrasound of her unborn twins in 2006. She told NBC that she is not "living off the taxpayers," but she has accepted food stamps. RadarOnline.com reported that she is living in a hotel room, although it's not clear who is paying for the room.
KTLA / AP
NBC's 'Today' broadcast footage Monday of Suleman visiting her octuplets in the California hospital where they were born Jan. 26. There are six boys and two girls.
MSNBC.com
A combination picture shows the octuplets. Clockwise from top left are: Josiah, Makai, Jeremiah, Nariyah, Jonah, Noah, Maliyah and Isaiah. All share the middle name Angel and the last name Solomon.
NBC / Reuters
Suleman did not disclose the name of her doctor, but she said on 'Today' that she went to the West Coast IVF Clinic in Beverly Hills. Its director is Kamrava, shown being followed by reporters Monday. Kamrava, 57, would not comment, but told reporters outside his clinic on Rodeo Drive that he had granted an interview to one of the television networks.
Nick Ut, AP
Kamrava enters his office Monday. Some fertility specialists have questioned his methods. "He's tried some novel techniques and some of those methods have been controversial," said Dr. John Jain, founder of Santa Monica Fertility Specialists. Ethicists have questioned the decision to implant so many embryos in Suleman, saying the health of both the mother and babies were at risk.
Nick Ut, AP
Without identifying the doctor, the Medical Board of California said last week that it was investigating Suleman's physician to see whether there may have been "a violation of the standard of care." The board said Monday it has not taken any disciplinary action against Kamrava in the past.
Nick Ut, AP
This is the building where Kamrava's clinic is located. Many have questioned why a doctor would help a single woman with six young children and no visible means of support to conceive more babies.
Nick Ut, AP
"To even take one percent of every night and devote it to someone else, a stranger, would be wrong," Suleman said. "I have to wait for that until my youngest have left school."
Suleman is going to wait at least 18 more years to have sex? If she had applied the same amount of self-discipline to baby making, she wouldn't be in the mess she's in now.
13-Year-Old Dad May Not Be Father After All
Teens & tweens, Pregnancy & birth
Despite his short stature -- he's barely four feet tall -- and his child's voice, 13-year-old Alfie Patten bravely stood up to fatherhood when his 15-year-old girlfriend Chantelle gave birth to their daughter, Maisie. "When my mum found out, I thought I was going to get in trouble. We wanted to have the baby but were worried how people would react," Alfie told The Sun last week.But Alfie may not be the father after all.
On Sunday, 16-year-old Richard Goodsell came forward to say that he thought there was a very good chance Maisie was his. "I know I could be the father. Everyone thinks I am. My friends all tell me that baby has my eyes -- even my mum thinks so," he told News of the World.
He's not the only one. Since Alfie and Chantelle shared their story in The Sun, yet another teen, Tyler Barker, 14, has come forward to say Maisie could be his. Several other boys have said they, too, have had sex with Chantelle.
A DNA test will be done "as soon as possible" to determine paternity, said a spokesman for Alfie's parents. "It would be prudent to have a DNA test."
Imagination Movers, Babies at Movies, and Olivia - Links We Love
Budget-minded cooks, here's your chance to get noticed. Join the Pantry Challenge and win one of ten prizes. Here's the catch, you've got to hop on over to The Motherhood and post in the Pantry Challenge circle today. -- The MotherhoodGot a little one who loves Disney's Imagination Movers? Find out what this entertaining dad band is like in real life. -- LilSugar
Pregnancy does a lot of weird things to your body, but for some women, one of the most frustrating is post-partum hair loss. It's temporary, we promise. -- AlphaMom
I want my kids to love Cookie Monster again, just so I have an excuse to make this adorable Cookie Monster cupcake. -- Strollerderby
Just three days after performing at the Grammy's, M.I.A. gives birth to a baby boy. "Having a baby is the most creative thing you can do," she says. -- Celebrity Baby Blog
Feel like your life is unorganized and out of control? Here are some quick tips to make your everyday routines go more smoothly. -- Work It, Mom!
Here's a quick way to make some enemies: Bring your baby to a movie. But people do it all the time. Would you? -- CafeMom
We've all had those "I can't believe I did that" moments, but eating another family's pizza and then getting caught? Ouch. What's your most embarrassing parenting moment? -- MomLogic
Are you the anti-craft parent? Then you'll enjoy the simplicity of this little activity -- give your kids mini-marshmallows and colored toothpicks and let them create. Simple, yet brilliant. -- PBS Supersisters
Patricia Resnick helped bring Olivia to life on Nick Jr's new series. Find out how she took our favorite pig from the page to the screen in this recent interview. -- Mommy Track'd
