Just as we were getting ready to return to an untanned, GTL-free life where “situation” is just another noun, MTV announced that Snooki, the Situation, JWoww, and the rest of the gang will back for another season of Jersey Shore this summer. The catch? The cast will ditch Jersey and “find themselves in a new destination.”
Rational reaction: Obviously, the northeast was out of the question if MTV wants to shoot during the winter for a summer premiere.
Actual reaction: Are you kidding me with this?! Jersey was practically the show’s 10th castmember! (note: count includes Angelina and the duck phone) Where else could they go?
Okay, breathe. Let’s figure this out. Any new location would have to meet the following requirements: 1) Warm weather to facilitate casual nudity 2) Proximity to tanning beds and clubs with lax clothing policies 3) Umm… Nope. I think that’s everything. So, with those criteria in mind, here are my nominees for the new pad:
Cabo San Lucas, Mexico
The obvious choice. Mexico’s spring break capital would provide plenty of sunshine and rowdy crowds, and the crew could save money by installing a margarita dispenser instead of a faucet in the kitchen.
Sicily, Italy
It might not be toasty there this time of year, but just imagine Mike meeting an Italian alter-ego who goes by “Il Situazione.”
Rio de Janeiro, Brazil
Summer in the southern hemisphere! Snooki discovers caipirinhas, the Situation creeps on distant relatives of Brazilian supermodel Gisele Bundchen, and the whole crew learns that Carnival (or as they say down there, Carnaval) is more than just a cruise line.
Those are my picks. Your turn, PopWatchers: Where should our favorite Jersey kids wash ashore next season?
Comments (1-15) of 140 Add your comment
How about Panama City, FL? Jersey meets rednecks… amazing things could happen.
Best idea on here, Molly!!
$130,000 to vacation. wow. MTV is retarded.
I like Miami
I had the same thought when I read this. Panama City would be PERFECT!
PCB is like the perfect amount of trashy, excellent choice Molly!
Fire Island. Cherry Beach. Make it totally gay.
UM HELLO!!!!!! The show is called Jersey Shore. I agree that the location was like another cast member. They should wait until June and just film the next season at another Jersey Shore location (Wildwood, LBI, etc.). GTL at the Jersey Shore, bitch!
future seasons of the show will be tainted by the cast’s celebrity. they should have picked a new group.
totally agree!
they might also be tainted by the massive camera crews following everyone around 24-7.
I think they were tainted by pictures of my taint.
How about Gitmo? We could watch them be slowly tortured…somewhat similar to what they do to us!
Haha! That comment was the best!
Hm…how about Mars? I would love to see what they’d do there…but there’s a catch…no oxygen! The theme could be “No Air”.
I was thinking somewhere cold like the South Pole until I read your suggestion. I wholeheartedly agree.
They could go to Hell…I hear it’s hot over there around this time of year.
Damn. Just what I was going to say.
Damn. Deaniac and Nose could go to hell hahaha what douchebags everyone loves jersey shore ur just haters find somethin better to do with ur life than hate on shit. haha people are so stupid sometimes
Me too.
Me three… and no return trip
Wait, the Devil called… He doesn’t want ‘em.
So is your mother’s a$$.
New Jersey isn’t hell?
How about College? That’s one place they’ve never been? How about volunteering? That’s one place they’ve never been? How about the ’00s because they are stuck in the 90s? No one wants to see your big hair anymore! And, lastly how about Jersey because only one of them is actually from Jersey!!!!
how about off the air.how about putting some real men on the show right now there are all women on.
How about Haiti.Make them do something good for a change
that was funny
They WENT to the Jersey Shore, no one said they had to be FROM the Jersey Shore. Pay attention.
I think wherever they go they can’t keep the show named Jersey Shore. First, they are not from New Jersey (except 1, I think) and I don’t want them to be what the rest of the country believe all residents from New Jersey are like. They are trash and need to go away. And MTV; $10,000 per person? I think you were ripped off.
OK Seriously; Hollywood Beach Florida. All the requirements and plenty of selection for settings.
I work in Hollywood and I agree!
i second that they should go off air. im from the jersey shore and they are exactly what us locals try to avoid. they are actually known as bennies around here. GO HOME BENNIES
I am from north jersey and i am proud to be a bennie but i am not a guido. not all bennies are guido’s is what i’m saying.
um, since part of this show is about learning about martians, er, I mean different cultures, can you please explain what a bennie is.
a bennie is someone from north jersey who goes down the shore during the summer.
Actually a Benny is supposedly Bayonne, Elizabeth, Newark & New York…yet out of all those, only the New Yorkers still go to places like Sleezeside & Belmar. When was the last time you were in Bayonne, Elizabeth or Newark?? Take a ride thru and tell me how many guidos you find there! They should really change the term to Siny..for the Staten Islanders that invade the shore.
Prison?
Boston. Who says you need warm weather to find and bring skanks back to the house, be Italian, facilitate bar fights, and be complete a**holes? Happens every day here in Boston. Weather shouldn’t matter. The rest of the U.S. needs to see that we can still party even though it’s -5 degrees out! Plus the locals and their attitudes aren’t too different than they are in Jersey. Boston would make for a good second season, even in Winter.
I can see Snooki getting jacked in the face again by some clown here or Ronnie knocking out some drunken heckler looking for a fight again. I’m not too proud of it, but this city lacks class. But hey, that’s what MTV’s show is going for, right?
Where should they go? Away.
Far far away