Digital Spy

Stay with us. This isn't as crazy as it sounds.

Because it turns out that Happy Mondays star Bez isn't just a mad Mancunian with maracas.


The percussionist has set up The Reality Party and is running to be MP of Salford in next year's general election, while his quest to sit in the House of Commons is being documented in 4OD online-only series 24 Hour Party Politics.

And in his own words, for Bez it's more about "frack than crack these days".

So after watching the show, Digital Spy presents the 9 reasons why we think Mark Berry should make it all the way to Number 10.

Order, order! Would these 13 celebrities get your vote at the next election?

1. Everything will be free


Sat barefooted in a teepee, Bez outlines his main political policy: "What I've promised everyone is free food, free energy, free drinking water, free public transport.

"The idea of the free food comes in with the permicultural existence. Do you know what I mean?

"If you do it as a community, you can take care of all your basic needs. There will be no need for food banks and all that."

2. Bankers will be a thing of the past


"Bankers. What can I say about them?" he explains. "People are waking up to the fact of who you are and what you're doing. And I think your days are numbered.

"You've got to remember these people are the unelected leaders of the world and run the world's banking system. It doesn't matter what side you are, they're pushing everyone's buttons."

3. He will get your bins sorted. Probably


While out and about with the public, someone asks Bez what his policy on refuse collection would be if he were MP. And, we think, it's good news. "Are we going to get our bins emptied once a week though, not every fortnight?" she challenges.

Bez replies: "We'll sort that out once we get in. You've got to get me in there first…I'm fighting the revolution, aren't I?"

4. Fracking will be no more


Bez's main political agenda is to ban fracking. Speaking at Festival Number 6 with chair Luke Bainbridge, Bez greets the crowd with the words: "How do, everyone?"

He then explains: "They're planning some fracking right in the middle of our city centre, and I couldn't actually believe it. I thought no way would it happen in England. We're not that f**king daft, you know what I mean? But unfortunately, it's true."

And as for his new lifestyle? "It's more frack than crack these days".

5. Bees will be treated with love


"I've never been this gentle in my life before. And working with bees – you've got to learn how to be gentle," Bez explains. "To me, they represent the battle for survival of what we've got to face ourselves."

As Mark Day of Happy Mondays adds: "I've learnt a lot about bees. He goes on about bees something rotten."

6. Shaun Ryder may well be Culture Secretary


Bez has the support of his fellow Mondays in his quest for political domination. Shaun Ryder, inexplicably lurking in the shadows backstage in his talking head, says: "I hope he does well – anti-fracking and all that lot. Well done, Bez."

Asked what we could see from Mark Berry MP, bandmate Paul Ryder adds: "You should expect the truth, and no lies."

7. He will be a man of the people


On the campaign trail, Bez meets one particularly impassioned supporter.

"You've gone all political," the bloke says. "I've seen a video of you. Everybody's waking up, aren't they? Good to see you doing that. F**king revolution, mate."

It's at this point he asks his friend to take a picture of him with Bez. This is the result:


8. His outlook is, how we can we say, Robin Hood-esque


Bez's manager Jayne Houghton enlightens us: "The first trip that I had was to Brazil when they [Happy Mondays] headlined Rocking Rio festival.

"And the highlight of that trip was Bez taught me to shoplift...Gucci loafers. In at the deep end."

9. Like the most successful people, he doesn't need much sleep


Bez's political career started because he'd had few too many at the pub, "wasn't in the best of moods" and went on a "raging rant" to the Manchester Evening News. During the interview with the paper, he declared that he was going to run as an MP in Salford.

And as his tour manager Alan Ingham (above) explains, he called him up in the morning to find out whether what he'd read in the paper was true. Alan was surprised to find Bez awake so early.

"I think it was about 8.30 in the morning, so Bez never normally answers the phone at 8.30 in the morning,' he explains.

"Maybe he'd just gone to bed, I don't know."

24 Hour Party Politics will conclude on 4OD next year in the run up to the 2015 General Election.