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Splitsider - Inside Jokes
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Splitsider

December 26th, 2014

We Promise Terry Isn’t the Author, by Luke Strickler

terryTerry is not the author, nor is he a reference to the author.

Terry is not any one of the author’s friends, a person who considers themselves a friend of the author, lost love, personal trainer, or you, Greg, so stop asking.

Terry’s name is not to be broken apart to find a hidden message, as the word “Retry” has no relation to the author other than his failed Candy Crush level.

Terry’s name is not an acronym or initialism, although both he and the author know the difference, and will bring it up in conversation.

Terry is 27 years old, which is too young to be a reminder of lost youth, too old to relate to the author, and 38 years short of being eligible for the senior discount at Ruby Tuesdays, of which the author is also ineligible.

Terry’s age does not represent the mental state of the author, as he does not feel that his mental state should be described as a number, but merely, “a constant nightmare.”

Terry is a white male of tall height, which is similar to that of the author, but who swears it’s just because Terry has two tall, white parents, most likely named Bryce and Molly. READ MORE

The Year in Interviews

bob-odenkirkIn 2014, the Splitsider team did over 150 interviews to get the inside information about your favorite things in comedy. Here’s a collection of the year’s most notable quotes from our conversations with some of the best people involved in comedy today. READ MORE

What I Learned from Another Year in the Archives

124 - Viva VarietyThe Paley Center for Media, which has locations in both New York and LA, dedicates itself to the preservation of television and radio history. Inside their vast archives of more than 150,000 television shows, commercials, and radio programs, there are thousands of important and funny programs waiting to be rediscovered by comedy nerds like you and me. Each week, this column will highlight a new gem waiting for you at the Paley Library to quietly laugh at. (Seriously, it’s a library, so keep it down.)

As I look back on the material I covered for this year’s run of From the Archives, I see a wide tapestry of comedy both fantastic and terrible. I see fallen comedic legends, moments of brilliance, and moments of complete failure. Here are some of the lessons I learned from another year in the archives.

This year’s series of articles, more than any stretch of these in the past, featured a number of looks inside the lifestyle of the comedian. Following the deaths of Joan Rivers and David Brenner, I looked at both of their interviews with Alan King, in which they talked about what drove them into comedy, and their methods to stay in the game when the going got rough. We saw Johnny Carson go back to his home town in Nebraska and give us a peek behind the curtain into his early life, while at the same time, not letting us too far in there. My favorite of this series of comedians breaking the fourth wall was when Edward R. Murrow interviewed Sid Caesar live from his New York apartment. In it, Sid shows off his kids, his art collection, his lovely wife, and his extensive gun collection. These examples of comedians talking about their craft and their lives off-stage were enlightening and showed how disparate backgrounds could lead to similar heights of comedy. READ MORE

The Year in Comedy Podcasts

2014. The year the podcast came back! What? Did it ever leave? Well, no. But with major ink from hoary old analog readers like New York Magazine and The Washington Post trumpeting “the return of the podcast!” it seems mainstream has finally figured out podcasting is a thing. Podcast impresario Kevin Smith even featured Justin Long portraying a podcaster who is transformed — painfully, and against his will — into a walrus in the feature film Tusk this year.

It seems that comedy isn’t the only main driver for the podcast medium any more. This year saw the rise of “must listen” shows like Startup, a podcast about a guy starting up a company to make podcasts, and Serial, a This American Life sort-of spinoff which got hot enough to garner mentions on television shows and sparked the interest of amateur sleuths across the country.

Before he exited the Earwolf Podcast Network as CEO, Jeff Ulrich helped to set the stage for a spinoff network, one focusing on pop culture, opinions, and celebrity insights. Unlike Earwolf, which focuses primarily on comedy, the baker’s dozen of shows to kick off Wolfpop aren’t necessarily laugh-driven. Fortunately, for comedy podcast fans, it’s hard to have a rack of shows hosted by comedian types that doesn't offer up a whole lot of laughs along the way anyway.

Ironically, just as podcasting is ramping up to be bigger than ever heading into 2015, it was announced this last year that Apple is stopping production of the iPod. Maybe someone should do a podcast about how the device, which was the namesake of this industry, is being relegated to history. READ MORE

The Best Comedy Directors of 2014

obvious childAs this column wraps up its first full year, I present the 1st Annual 2014 Comedy Film School Awards. These awards are determined by a voting body of one and hold all the prestige and none of the starpower of the Hollywood Film Awards. The idea is not to rank or give out superlatives, but rather use these names to discuss some of the most interesting work of 2014, why, and what this could mean for a larger comedy landscape this year and going forward. READ MORE

Snow Globe Weather Forecast, by Alonso Cisneros

snowglobeSunday: Snowstorm. Flurries.
Clear and sunny skies on this warm morning, suddenly followed by a snowstorm after someone shakes the snow globe for a few seconds. Prepare for it to snow relentlessly for no meteorological reason whatsoever, except for someone shaking the snow globe for the fun of it. Flurries expected for the rest of the day.

Monday: Snowstorms throughout the day.
Snow globe shaken over the course of the day, ranging from lazily to mildly, resulting in high winds and violent snowstorms across the area. Most likely to receive the same two inches of snow that always lies on the surface of the globe. Don't bother shoveling or calling plow services. The snow will settle back onto your driveways by the end of the night.

Tuesday: Snowstorms throughout the day.
Power outages expected. Snowstorm heading in from the northwest when a guy moves in on the snow globe and shakes it. He will come back numerous times, somehow receiving joy in inflicting damage on the town with more snowstorms. Power outages are expected throughout the area, due to the severity of how hard this man has decided to shake the snow globe. READ MORE

The Definitive 'Best Web Series of 2014' List

bestwebvideos2014You're going to see a lot of lists over the next 2 weeks. "Best of This" and "Best of That." Everything you've consumed or thought about consuming this year will be put into a sort of arbitrary context by some oaf who doesn't much like spending time with family and does like listing the 10 or 20 or 100 things he or she thinks are "super legit." It's pathetic, presumptuous, and totally subjective. This is not one of those lists for one reason and one reason only: it's definitive, objective, and 100% right in every way. You could argue with the selections, but you'd be wrong. So don't embarrass yourself. Read below and get in the know (#rhyme2014). These are the five best web series of the year.

(Listen: if you disagree, that's totally cool. There's a ton of really great stuff that came out this year. These are just straight up gut calls. I actually had a list of like 75 at first. Then I chopped it down because Adam Frucci yelled. He wasn't mad, he just…Anyway, everyone this column covered this year is great and should feel really proud. Don't let lists like this define you.)

Do not test me on this. These are the 5 and I'm VERY sure of that. Get it? READ MORE

Report: 'The Interview' Is Coming to YouTube Tomorrow

According to a report by CNN Money, Sony is near a deal with Google to release The Interview as a rental on YouTube tomorrow, the same day it'll be released at thousands of independent movie theaters around the country. The deal still isn't final, and it won't be exclusive, so it's likely that it'll also be available on other streaming/downloading services such as VOD. But it's a groundbreaking move, especially in light of the fact that just a week ago Sony was claiming that it had no plans to release the movie — ever.

Obviously there's no way that Sony is going to make back the many, many millions of dollars that this hack has cost them with just this movie, but this does have the potential to have The Interview be seen by even more people than it would have with just a traditional theatrical release. Oops, Kim Jong-Un! It backfired!

UPDATE: Looks like it's actually coming out this afternoon at 1pm – it'll be $6 to rent and $15 to own through YouTube, Google Play, and Xbox Vide.. Check out SeeTheInterview.com for all of the details.

The 16 Best Comedy Books of 2014

bookshelvesTo add to your diet of comedy consumption which is likely already at critical mass, what with the comedy movies, sitcoms, sketch comedy shows, web videos, Twitter feed, and novelty T-shirts, here's your reading list: the best comedy books of 2014. This year had an especially delightful selection of comedy and comedy-related books. Here then are some of the comedy history, comedy theory, comedy memoirs, comic essay collections, and comic novels that stood out. READ MORE

Sony to Release 'The Interview' After All

Sony has announced that it's reversed its decision to not release The Interview, and instead will kick off a limited theatrical run on Christmas Day alongside a same-day VOD release. Major chains such as Regal and AMC are unlikely to show the movie; instead, art house theaters such as The Plaza Theater in Atlanta and The Alamo Drafthouse in Dallas/Fort Worth have announced that they'll be showing it. Other theaters are likely to announce screenings soon.

It's a rapid about-face from Sony, which has suffered possibly the biggest corporate hack in history and threats of violence at screenings of the movie. But with even President Obama saying that they shouldn't give in to the demands of North Korea, its great to see that The Interview will see the light of day. Even if it might not be very good.

The Year in Comedy Movies

the_lego_movieWhen I look back on the year in comedy movies, a few indelible images come to mind. The two-beat punch of Morgan Freeman introducing Michelangelo the painter and Michelangelo the Ninja Turtle in The Lego Movie. Jenny Slate peeling off her shirt before giving an emotional and vulnerable monologue in Obvious Child. Matt Vogel as evil frog Constantine trying to learn Kermit’s voice in Muppets Most Wanted, a scene that made me think “too soon, too soon,” even though Jim Henson has been dead for almost 25 years now.

Also: Melissa McCarthy with a bag on her head in Tammy, and… um… Bradley Cooper making jokes about stealing somebody’s leg? Was Guardians of the Galaxy a comedy movie?

I admit I had to stretch my brain a bit to remember all of the comedy movies that came out this year. When I look back on the year in film, I see a lot of Marvel superheroes, Ninja Turtles, and Transformers. I feel like half the movies I saw this year involved people, turtles, and raccoons fighting bad guys in battle sequences so tedious that I actually fell asleep during Guardians of the Galaxy. (Don’t worry. I woke up in time for Dancing Baby Groot.)

So let’s recap. READ MORE

A Wild Year in Late Night

stewart_colbert2014 saw more changes in the world of late night than any other in recent memory. David Letterman, Craig Ferguson, and Stephen Colbert announced they would be leaving their long-running shows while Jimmy Fallon, Seth Meyers, and John Oliver started new, widely popular ones. Let's break down all of these late night milestones that took place in 2014. READ MORE

iQ by Intel: The 3D Movie That Rewired a Brain

The Original Paleo Diet, by Keith Wisniewski

meatZogg thank you all for coming to Zogg’s cave. Zogg has some big news to share. Sure, Zogg may not have come up with idea for fire, but Zogg have pretty good idea to stay trim and healthy. Zogg call it the Paleo Diet.Zogg know this works, because Zogg used to be what you call “big boned,” but is now in shape. Zogg even have “six pack” and is getting all the ladies in the Eurasian subcontinent, thanks to this diet. And you can, too. It’s so simple, even a Neanderthal could follow it.

Step one: Eat meat.There, Zogg teach you everything about Paleo Diet!

Zogg kidding, of course. Zogg have highly developed sense of humor for his tribe. There more to it than that. The first thing you need to do is catch some meat. This harder than it seems, because meat doesn’t like to be caught. In high school, Zogg held the state record for javelin. So, Zogg use those skills to hunt wild animals with spear. Zogg so good he can hit a rabbit at 40 yards. But, if you aren’t as good as Zogg with spear, Zogg suggest clubbing raccoons when they tip over your garbage can. Zogg says you’re welcome.

Besides rabbit, Zogg likes to eat bear, wildebeest, dire wolf, badger, you name it. But, Zogg’s favorite dish is giraffe. On Zogg’s Paleo Diet, you can eat foot after foot of delicious giraffe neck and not gain any weight. Hey, Atoouk, who’s the genius now? (Atoouk invent the wheel.) READ MORE