Uncyclopedia:Adopt-A-Noob
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Adopt-A-Noob Campaign
As part of our annual appeal the Royal Society for the Prevention Against Cruelty to Noobs would like to remind you of the plight of some of these poor creatures. Our Adopt-A-Noob scheme is intended to help these unfortunates back into life within Uncyclopedian society. With your help, we can do it.
From our main rehousing centre in Wiki City we are able to facilitate hundreds of waifs and strays. But it is only with increasing support from the general public that we can tackle this problem head on. Plus, all adopters get Y40 for the cause.
Examples Of Neglect
"An Australian Sheep Dog, who we will call WWW, won the Best in Show in the Noob of the Month competition in December. By early January his owners had left him to run wild. When we found him, he was abandoned and lost, his coat was in bad condition and he was barely able to type."
"Katy, a 17 year old bitch, was left to wander the mean streets of Uncyclopedialand, occasionally marking her territory with small deposits. After the RSPCN took her under our wing she was released to a good home, where Katy has become a much loved and valued companion"
"12 year old Ninny was left confused and lonely, a victim of the recent European conflict. His owner Sgt F Lamb, removed him from the battlefront, but his temperament, foaming at the mouth and biting, left him considering euthanasia. Thats when we took him, and after castration he is now able to deal with other people again."
What Can YOU Do To Help?
A donation of just £4 per month ($50 US)($700
Remember, a Noob is for life, not just for Christmas. Although maybe just for the summer as some hibernate.
Alternately, you could sign up to be a mentor for noobs in need, and add {{Adopting}} to your user page to let noobs know you care you're there. It'll give you a real sense of accomplishment. Plus, it's cheaper.
Adopt A Noob Sign Up
Whether you signed up five minutes ago, or have been lurking for 6 months and still don't have the hang of things, we can help.
Browse our list of available mentors, choose someone, and leave a message on their talk page.