User:Kelpan/conservapedia

Welcome to Conservapedia, The free unbiased encyclopedia that anywasp can edit. 37,279 articles in English

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Welcome to Conservapedia A conservative encyclopedia you can trust. Conservapedia has over 10,000 educational, clean, and concise entries, including more than 350 lectures and term lists. There have been over 11,600,000 page views and over 172,000 page edits. This site is evolving expanding rapidly. Daily Bible verse: "Jesus answered and said unto them, 'Verily I say unto you, If ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do this which is done to the fig tree, but also if ye shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; it shall be done. And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive.'" Gospel of Matthew, 21:21-22 Daily Historical Quote: "Those who deny freedom to others, deserve it not for themselves; and, under a just God, can not long retain it." Abraham Lincoln, letter to Henry L. Pierce and others, April 6, 1859. Please read our rules here, and how we differ from Wikipedia here. Today's featured article Homosexuality is sexual activity between members of the same sex. Sexual relations between two men is condemned in both Old and New Testaments. It is forbidden directly four times in the Bible. All references in Amplified Version Old Testament Leviticus 18:22 - You shall not lie with a man as with a woman; it is an abomination. Leviticus 20:13 - If a man lies with a man as one lies with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. They must be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads. New Testament (Epistles) 1 Corinthians 6:9 - Do you not know that the unrighteous and the wrongdoers will not inherit or have any share in the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived (misled): neither the impure and immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor those who participate in homosexuality more Recently featured: Evilution, Intelligent design, Blasphemy, Global warming, Hollywood values, Atheism and obesity, A wizard did it Breaking News Terrorists surrender to American might Minority-hating Democrats seek to oust Gonzales US Democrats give Entire World to Terrorists FOX News Study: 90% of liberals hate liberals More false trails left by God to test our faith have been found by stupid gullible scientists recently. That God of ours certainly is a tricksy one! Roger Williams University forces students to watch Al Gore's movie in order to graduate! "[W]e should stop calling these schools 'bastions of knowledge' since they're really bastions of leftist thought," one student observed. See story here. Today(ish) in History June 10 2006AD Unbelievers still burning in hell October 23, 4004BC G-d makes the universe December 25 0AD Jesus born. November 28 1095AD First crusades launched. Many unbelievers ground beneath righteous boots March 19 2003AD United States launches second glorious crusade against heathens. Did you believe? ...that if you've ever visited uncyclopedia you're going to hell? ...that you probably are anyway? ...that this will result in an eternity of unimaginable pain? ...that G-d will send you there because He loves you? ...that only 4% of Americans are atheists, and everybody hates them? ...that -ology is a suffix derived from the latin word meaning "work of the devil"? ...that Jesus is coming back real soon? ...that ignorance is strength? ...that all atheists hate God? ...that the KJV Bible was good enough for Jesus? ...that Catholics are Mary-worshipping heretics? ...that Muslims are even worse than Catholics? ...that dinosaurs were vegetarians back when they lived in the Garden of Eden? ...that scientists are liars? ...that they're all going to hell too! Ha ha ha ha ha hah'm er, and I, um, pray for their salvation (not that that'll do them any good).

Today's featured picture
[vote] Goatsebusters.jpg Goatsebusters.jpg - 12.5 deleted images ( 18.5 / 6 ) There's something strange, and it don't look good. Who ya gonna call? Image credit: RadicalX

Writer and Noob of the Month

GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia! Seriously, we love you. Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor. Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come! It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon! HEIL FROSTY! Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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	UnNews The news source on crack		Uncyclopedia The content-free encyclopedia		Undictionary The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
	UnTunes Where noisy things can live and prosper		Games Another way to waste time		HowTo Instructions and guides for anything and everything
	UnBooks Content-free books		Unquotable Useless misquotes galore		Uncycloversity If it makes sense, we don't want it
	UnPoetia Poetry for people who hate poetry		UnDebate Debating all the irrelevant issues		UnScripts We can ruin stage and film too
	Why? Don't make me explain it to you twice		UnReviews We'll tell you why things suck		UnBestiary Moo! Grrr! Narf! Harblesnock!
			UnCommons Broken media repository

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This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 37,279 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:

	Uncyclopedia English United Kingdom 32194	Desciclopédia Português Brazil 55644	アンサイクロペディア 日本語にほんご Japan 20675	Nonsensopedia Polski Poland 18266	Nonciclopedia Italiano Italy 14849
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Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on May 2, 2019. We know you're doing much better now; we simply can't be bothered.

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​	Ebatsüklopeedia Eesti Estonia 96	Neciklopēdija Latviešu Latvia 158	Juokopedija Lietuvių Lithuania 276	Neciklopedio Esperanto Esperanto 4720	Unsaiklopedia 𐌲𐌿𐍄𐌹𐍃𐌺‬ Goths 12
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on May 2, 2019. We know you're simply bustling these days, but we simply can't be bothered.

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