User talk:Nigel Scribbler

• Archive 01

White People

This was one of the photos in the set, we're working with her to have a few outdoor locations so she can get the word out with the anthology project.

Take a look what just got added and try not to drink anything, the woman in the photo will be in a project a contact is hosting as she's got a series of them and a few more coming when she's ready. She got a hands on approach to Africa History (Egypt) as she will see a few more photos based upon this when she's in between her studies. Imagine what happens when White People snag this for their recreational amusement (look up the case where a man died in California of heart failure.)

You get to see this in full color, the person who sold this saw a few of the photos and leaving suggestions.

This might be somewhat controversial, but when you ask she got the ideas for, you might be surprised.. She got the idea from two on facebook who each are doing this kind of photo, this might work for an Egypt page. She didn't expect getting this to work with but when you see the other photo you might see some funny in this.

“It was a perfect fit, it wasn't too confining. The pictures on the wood floor we were at it for maybe a little under an hour. The ones on the bed and chair maybe an hour and a half.”

~ Mitzi on seeing herself in this

Well you have to admit this was trippy to see her response to this and we're trying to get her here and on WritersCafe.org, I think the section she would do well in is Egypt because of her experience. If you're capable of hosting video we might have her discuss Christian Nightmares and The Babylon Bee.--Factfinder510 (talk) 03:39, February 12, 2019 (UTC)

|Who are these photos of? Are they from a blog?? --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 15:54, March 1, 2019 (UTC)

This is a friend who is connected to African History Network, she goes back many years she sent them to me via facebook. Some of them are published in a project we worked on. Today is her 48th birthday. --Factfinder510 (talk) 20:09, March 2, 2019 (UTC)

Admin

On the Fork, they're nominating all active admins and bureaucrats here for the same position there. If you sign up there, you can get nominated! I know there was a fake Nigel Scribbler there, so you'll have to use a different name. DAP Dame Pleb Com. Miley Spears (talk) 19:52, March 1, 2019 (UTC)

You may have to revote

Voting options have changed on Forum:Hosting options for Uncyclopedia (wikia). Because the set up of the vote has been changed, some people, including possibly you, need to know, You may have to recast your vote for it to count. Voting will end on Saturday, 23 March 2019 (check vote for time zone; currently it's set for Hawaii).  King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  16:51, March 16, 2019 (UTC)

NOTICE: If you respond to this directly, it will actually take you to the template I used for this message, so please don't respond directly. The technical reason for this error is I don't know what the hell I'm doing. (If someone wants to fix the template for me, go ahead.)  King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  00:57, March 17, 2019 (UTC)  

CLPIII

We're giving Luke Perry a gentle touch but take look what I found; this is in case his kids find the page and some of his cast mates. The roles he played in the 1990s will be eye opening as you check the media right? Well here's a kicker one of his cast mate's web mistress got a hold of me with what I found with the film Normal Life read the reviews of this and the locals discussions. Lines up with Illinois.--Factfinder510 (talk) 18:47, March 23, 2019 (UTC)

Disambiguation

May I make a Disambiguation Page of people with the surname “Johnson?” -TyetheBlockhead (talk) 04:01, March 27, 2019 (UTC)

Definitely! If it's something Wikipedia does it's good here. Probably the only reason not to is if there are only 2 possible similar entries where you would just use the Oops template or a redirect at the top of an article page. -- (talk) 05:16, March 27, 2019 (UTC)

Something I noticed

While looking through some Johnsons (hehe) I noticed that there is Samuel Johnson and Samuel L. Johnson. You might wanna delete one. -TyetheBlockhead (talk) 05:47, March 27, 2019 (UTC)

Have read both now and they are very different. There are people with nearly identical names anyway so these are both accepted. -- (talk) 21:51, March 29, 2019 (UTC)

Hi Nigel,

Thanks for helping me to edit the article! Greetings!

Recount!

Some people who voted were kicked out as sockpuppets the vote has to have a recount! https://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Forum:Hosting_options_for_Uncyclopedia_(wikia) Black Enforcer (talk) 16:01, April 9, 2019 (UTC)

The ICU

https://liberapedia.wikia.org/wiki/Ray_Comfort look into this with the context. There was something there as I was tweaking this one to make it line up.--Factfinder510 (talk) 04:30, April 12, 2019 (UTC)

RE: Worst reasons to become a Christian

I meet people who had gone to these in Iowa. Assemblies of God had a counterpart to this called Heaven's Gates...Hell's Flames. The play referenced in the published works.

1. Uncyclopedia is not liberapedia. Nothing has to line up between the two.

2. If nobody reads the liberapedia article, they do not know what is happening here. Ray Comfort is not a well-known person and needs to be explained.

3. You fail to communicate whatever point you are trying to make by your disjointed writing. Try to be clear. You are writing for others to read, not for yourself; understand their position if you can.

4. Uncyclopedia is a humor site. Where is the humor in what you have added to the article? The site does not exist for people to write whatever they like, which you are doing here and have done on other articles.

5. Realize then that your comment is an excuse and not a valid reason. You need to try much harder in how you communicate effectively rather than writing a lot of words. -- (talk) 06:00, April 12, 2019 (UTC)

There's something there and the funny becomes factual. Run with true funny with this one as I came from an Assemblies of God background so this would have to be almost style joke in some ways. Let me show you something image wise as I had to find more images for the article. He's known enough. He works closely with Answers in Genesis as you will see a connection between them if you look close enough, it's shocking when you do. --Factfinder510 (talk) 17:03, April 12, 2019 (UTC)

Wikia merging forum

I've mostly edited the forked site, because reasons, if you get my drift. --_Mohicans says ^hi 00:29, April 15, 2019 (UTC)

Uncyclopedia

When will the site be shut down? -TyetheBlockhead (talk) 03:36, April 17, 2019 (UTC)

This is still unknown to me. The last estimate for the transfer to Uncyclomedia/Lyrithia/Athyria's server was about now. Follow Forum:Uncyclomedia for any new announcement. If no warning is given and you find the site closed, I will try to post the new location to your FANDOM message wall. -- (talk) 03:57, April 17, 2019 (UTC)

Thanks. -TyetheBlockhead (talk) 05:01, April 17, 2019 (UTC)

Thanks

Hi Nigel,

I just wanted to thank you for everything. Cheers!

---

BTW It's me again KEKW

I've decided to go back to writing some more articles but I cannot log in because my last login was on April 2019 apparently. Basically the site told me to contact an admin to get my account back. This account is just my old account ending in 2. —The preceding unsigned comment was added by Ojuqplasta2 (talk • contribs)

Nigel is currently inactive on this site. For password retrieval ask Llwy-ar-lawr. RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 21:49, 26 May 2022 (UTC)

Article not appearing in VFH

Hi Nigel,

I've tried reaching you via chat but it seems like we don't sign in at the same time. See, my LR article is nominated for being featured but doesn't appear in the VFH. It's been happening since the last Saturday...got any clue on how to fix it?

Scroll down past the blue list of highlighted articles and the voting section with the link to the article is there. You might have to refresh the page if you always stay signed in. -- (talk) 20:45, April 22, 2019 (UTC)

I knew that. What I mean is that the first article after the blue part more often than not is the Persia one, followed by the other three but mine hasn't appeared 4 out of 6 times I've checked the VFH page. Is there any explanation for this?

I have no idea, if it is not a browser cache problem. It has shown up for me every time I checked. -- (talk) 18:10, April 23, 2019 (UTC)

Ok. Thanks for answering.

I got a short memory; I now remember had the same problem earlier. Romartus told me to hit the PURGE control above the blue box to update the whole page. So it's a site cache problem. See if that works if you see the article missing again. -- (talk) 20:39, April 23, 2019 (UTC)

Greetings

Hi guys. Looks pretty decent so far and familiar enough. Articles could load faster -- would more money solve this and how much would that be? I will be changing my password for the site. Llwy, you might unlock your talk page.

Plus, if you need something done manually/brute force, let me know. I'll have to have permission, of course. ~~Nigel Scribbler

Good to see you here. I have unprotected my talk page, but you could have posted on it anyway because the rights were carried over. Things do seem a little sluggish, but I have a hard time telling how slow it really is because I've been having browser speed issues. Caching is important for wiki performance, and I haven't done much with it yet. I'm looking into setting up either Squid or Varnish, which are both free. Performance may also be abnormally low because I had the silly idea of setting up an extra wiki here and running "grabText.php" on it in the hope of getting any missing edits. There's still a ~70k discrepancy between the number of edits on the backup wiki and the number reported on the Wikia site. I don't know what's going on. I suspect these alleged edits are either bogus or inaccessible. ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr • talk • contribs • 00:19 4 May 2019

How does a reversion count? There's been several larger ones of those very recently. -- (talk) 03:34, 4 May 2019 (UTC)

An edit and a revert of that edit count as one each. It's things like page moves which are tricky to count, as they affect an old page, a new page and a Special:Log entry.

As for caching? Running MediaWiki servers is a bottomless pit into which sysadmins pour endless cache. mw:Manual:Cache and mw:Manual:Performance tuning give an overview, but cache is likely to turn up three or four places on the same site:

• PHP caching, such as Zendcache. (APC used to do this, but that function was stripped out of APCu). Installed directly into the PHP in the web server, this compiles the PHP script on the fly and stores the compiled code in memory until the Apache server is next restarted. As the same code is executed repeatedly by the server, a cached compiled copy saves time.
• Parser caching, such as APCu or Memcached, stores various bits and pieces (like user logins and the Mediawiki:Sidebar) in memory to make the PHP run a bit quicker.
• File caching of rendered pages to disk - rarely used, but is a last resort if a reverse proxy like Squid/Varnish isn't available, or:
• Reverse proxy (like Squid or Varnish) stores the finished HTML pages for users who are not logged in, are reading the standard view of the page and don't have user-specific info like "you have nude massages new messages" or an IP address visible atop the screen.

An external content delivery network (such as Cloudflare, which was used to over-aggressively cache *.uncyclopedia.info pages since 2014) adds an additional layer of cache (to a site already running APCu, Zend and Memcache) to deliver outdated content more quickly again. The site tends to get many duplicate requests for things like "load.php" (sitewide CSS/JS, skins, static content); an aggressive cache prevents most of these from reaching the main server at all - with a noticeable affect on server load and response time. carlb (talk) 04:43, 4 May 2019 (UTC)

Loading times for articles is excellent now. Thanks! I was surprised to see Today's Featured Picture working but displaced, but that turned out to be transient. -- (talk) 02:41, 5 May 2019 (UTC)

I didn't do anything. I've had mw:Manual:$wgUseFileCache turned on the whole time, so if you're seeing faster load times it's probably because there's more stuff in the cache. I suspect search engine spiders. I did install Squid about an hour ago, but it only works on HTTP so far. I'll do more on this in the coming days. ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr • talk • contribs • 06:17 6 May 2019

Interesting...looks familiar..--RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 17:53, 7 May 2019 (UTC)

On uncyclopedia.ca

Hi. I just came here from en.uncyclopedia.co, and I've got a few questions.

First of all, are sockpuppets allowed here? I might need one, in order to help me settle here.

Second, are links to the other Uncyclopedias (such as en.uncyclopedia.co) allowed?

Kevin (talk) 20:46, 14 May 2019 (UTC)

Hasn't been discussed on .ca, and I don't speak for .ca, but as it is a continuation of the Wikia site, the rules there were:

1. You are welcome to put on your user page any way to get in touch with you, through this website or independent of it;
2. You are not welcome to direct traffic away from here, especially every time you sign a page (see UN:SIG).
3. Multiple identities are a major headache and their only use is if you feel like voting multiple times. Please don't. Spıke 🎙️21:00 14-May-19

Reverting vandals

1. Thank you for notifying Uncyclopedians of the move, but doesn't this suffer from the "To everyone within the sound of my voice..." phenomenon?
2. When reverting vandals, I suggest you do so in a way that preserves none of their content in the change summary, and does not convey that they annoyed you. Either might be rewarding to them. Cheers! Spıke 🎙️11:00 17-May-19

1. My thought that this is the only and I think last way of potentially contacting users left in the cold after the closing at Wikia. The usertalkpage posts should translate into email notices, if their email addys are still present (mine was) and notifications from Uncyclopedia haven't been blocked by them. I will quit this project then.

2. Got it. I lately have been cutting down the opening line that appear in the block report, and didn't there. I still think other admins would like some key if the vandal/spammer returns under a different IP.

Encouragement of vandals seemed not to be a problem before with a lot of admin venting before and after abusefilter came into use, nor was it at the last months at Wikia. After we were advised by a couple of admins that keeping IP addresses blocked forever was counterproductive, I unblocked many, many IP addresses, basically only keeping active spammers and repeat vandals permabanned. I've only seen a couple from temp or old infinite bans return since, including the Lucy the Mouse creator/reverter whose article you recently deleted (again). Also, check out the block log; site attacks are at historic lows. Even in the last 2 months after the shutdown announcement, there wasn't an increase in attacks.

We HAD very quick response and 24 hour coverage from 5 watchers in the last year or so. Now that CavaX and StarmanW are apparently gone, that's not so. -- (talk) 20:26, 17 May 2019 (UTC)

Thanks for reminding me as regards CavaX and StarmanW. I have left messages on their walls at Fandom. Though neither of them were article contributors, they were invaluable in protecting the site when I was running out of active admins. At least I know they weren't Loveshade puppets. --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 20:42, 17 May 2019 (UTC)

Great minds think alike (mine much more slowly). I posted over there also but didn't think to look for any earlier posts. -- (talk) 21:05, 17 May 2019 (UTC)

Your email address is only here because you logged in. It will not be for anyone who hasn't, unfortunately. I can't do that. This piece of code logs into Wikia with the username and password provided, then retrieves the email and other information. Since Wikia doesn't provide the user table, this is the best I can do. ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr • talk • contribs • 22:13 17 May 2019

Old edits

I would like all of my old edits from my past accounts imported to this one so my history on this site is not lost forever. Please let me know if this is possible, thanks. I would also like confirmation that Spike won't be banning me ever again before I start editing. Abacab (talk) 22:08, 18 May 2019 (UTC)

Abacab, you are a known-unfunny editor whose only function here has been to leave your mark on hundreds of Featured Articles in violation of a long-established rule, and to defy any bans by creating sockpuppets. Your request for "confirmation" is tacit admission that you intend to engage in bannable conduct, for which you insist on not being banned; that is, that you will not be bound by any rules. As Nigel has no way to give you any such guarantee except to deopp me, I suggest it would be better for everyone if you did not start editing. Spıke 🎙️23:23 18-May-19

So that's a no then? Abacab3 (talk) 23:43, 18 May 2019 (UTC)

You want a guarantee you won't be blocked? Hmmm.... How to explain this?
It really, really, REALLY doesn't work that way. Not with Spike, nor with anybody else. (I got a laugh out of it, though, so that was good -- your request definitely qualifies as an example of "humorous" writing.) -- Snarglefoop (talk) 00:00, 19 May 2019 (UTC)

Thanks! Abacab3 (talk) 00:01, 19 May 2019 (UTC)

Yeah what they said. I'm afraid all you can do is be careful and hope for the best. A block isn't the end of the world. Also could you not post here while you're blocked? I can give you access to User talk:Abacab if you don't want to wait.

Your previous accounts and their edits are all here, and you can still log into them. You can also have them merged into this one. Only bureaucrats can do that, so you'll have to talk to Romartus or Spike about getting it done (the others seem to not be around lately). ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr • talk • contribs • 00:09 19 May 2019

I was invited to edit here by Nigel but Abacab333 is still blocked. It would be best if you unblock Abacab333 and merge that with Abacab. Abacab also needs to be unblocked. Abacab3 (talk) 00:20, 19 May 2019 (UTC)

OK, listen. Spike indefed you (Abacab) way back when, right? And Nigel invited you back. That may or may not have been a good move, but what's done is done. However, it puts Spike in the middle, in opposition to another admin. That's awkward. So, here -- you want a guarantee you won't get banned by Spike? Sure. If you do anything to tick Spike off, I'll permaban you.
Deal? Good! Now remember, be funny, and not just stupid! -- Snarglefoop (talk) 00:32, 19 May 2019 (UTC)

I also think that Abacab333 as a username should remain blocked. Really, it's your fault for getting banned so don't expect anyone to do you favors by consolidating what you have created under different socks. You were contacted as Abacab333 since the other name didn't exist on FANDOM.

This person is also on the fork, so a lot of their older stuff is available there up to 2013 or so. The person has come back under at least one other username since (proving permabans are weak). I/we have had repeats of old problems with editing other writer's article to no purpose and even an instance of plagiarism. But "newer username" has shown they can actually write funny when they put their minds to it and has made several decent contributions when this place was a pure ghost town (I think 1 independent featured article and 1 or 2 co-written featured). Also, when "new username" was being forced by me to walk a tightrope in the last year sticking to own articles only, the user did that.

Come in under Abacab; it should work now, including your password for it. So, if you can stand the pressure, because you know Spike, Snarglefoop and I will be watching and potentially criticizing, I am giving you conditional amnesty. You could still be banned for doing bad, just like anyone else. So, do the best you can. I recommend that you (for now) stick to your own new articles (collaborators worked for you before) and expand existing stubs (under 3000Bytes or so). That should be interesting enough for you not to stray into bad habits/bad writing. Good luck! -- (talk) 02:20, 19 May 2019 (UTC)

This is Iyarita

Hi Nigel, I honestly did not intend to impersonate anyone when I chose my account name. It was a version of a name (Iyarito) that I had seen on a Pokemon site and taken a liking to. But if I choose a different name, can I please come back and edit here? I will try to be a useful contributor here. 96.31.193.237 22:51, 19 May 2019 (UTC)

None of this bears on your addition of the category "Hjghjvkb" to a page. That's what we call "vandalism", as I'm sure you're well aware. Please see your talk page for more information. -- Snarglefoop (talk) 23:11, 19 May 2019 (UTC)

You have been conditionally reinstated as Iyarita. Your reason for your username is accepted. The far worse problem was your category edits. As noted above, leaving garbage on pages is vandalism. For "Keyboard", if a category does not exist at this point, do not create a new one unless you are prepared to find every article in the 33,000 existing and link them. Now there are also very few joke categories have been allowed to stand from earlier days, but that's it. That said, we do not need category-only editors here. There are already several users doing this specifically plus many others doing this while reading older articles.

If you want to read or write funny articles, that's really what we're all here for. If you're willing to correct spelling, grammar, bad writing and categories while reading, that is certainly encouraged. Good luck. -- (talk) 23:35, 19 May 2019 (UTC)

Factfinder

Would you please review this user's edits, notably in your Cellphone Decade? I am having as much trouble following them as...well, his posts to talk pages. Spıke 🎙️03:08 20-May-19

His Cellphone Decade edits were reverted as being too obscure and badly done. Will continue on to other articles. -- (talk) 04:25, 20 May 2019 (UTC)

User:Zana Dark

Llwy reverts you here and cites our rule correctly in the Edit Summary. You are allowed to use your user page to tell people where you went, and this is all this is. (Incidentally, signatures are not allowed to point off-site, though that is not what this is.) Spıke 🎙️00:54 24-May-19

So noted. Zana Dark's userpage on the fork is marked RETIRED. There is no real relevance to the link anymore. His/her favorite topics were things like golden showers, turd, etc., etc. that were axed and reverted back by him/her. So will Zana Dark retain rollback rights when the rollbackers are added to AbuseFilter 17? Further, by writing style, I am sure you know that Zana Dark was clearly a male, but no maliciousness is proven by that. And returning as a sockpuppet later. That all gets rewarded in my view by allowing the link. -- (talk) 01:20, 24 May 2019 (UTC)

Whether Zana arrived where she said she was going is not our concern. Whether Zana wrote funny stuff does not impact on the fair application of our rules. I do not know that Zana is a male; I do not know that you are a male; I happen to think Zana was as big a drama queen as Miley. I know that Miley had a sock and I don't know that Zana did. Nevertheless, the goal of our rules is not to ensure that all possible bad things happen to people we decide, independent of the rules, are bad, but to try to make our own behavior predictable.

Zana will retain her rights not to have Abuse Filter 17 nag her not to insert external links, if she edits here and retains Rollbacker at the time of her edit. (I see she has Rollbacker and am not inclined to go in and strip her of it for the calumny of leaving Uncyclopedia.) This is the usual case, otherwise I would have to reapply for Admin. And wouldn't that be a disruptive crap-fest?! Spıke 🎙️02:00 24-May-19

I think allowing links to the fork is a good thing. Trying to suppress them alienates people and gives the impression that we're evil dictators who hate "free speech". I wouldn't expect a woman to write something like UnPoetia:Show Me Your Tits!, but I don't see what that has to do with... anything? Retired users' user pages should be left alone unless there's a compelling reason to change them. These aren't. I notice Zana reappeared on the fork in April this year, for what it's worth. (I think the sock referred to was Sir Codpiece.) ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr • talk • contribs • 02:25 24 May 2019

(No indentation in this discussion? Oh, well, I can do that.) Just to throw my 1.5 cents in, this guy sounds pretty seriously ugh, his taste in humor tends toward the disgusting, and after reading the Fork's "news release" about our sad demise and how we all ran over to leap on board the Fork because it's So Wonderful, I have a hard time really seeing a reason for including any links at all to them over here. (Maybe if I squinch my eyes up really hard I can sort of see a reason, but it's still kind of blurry.) As to hating "free speech", sure, I can do that, maybe, depending on what is meant by it -- these days "free speech" mostly seems to mean shouting Nazi slogans and accusing people you don't like of conspiring to wreck the world. (In Europe they don't even give lip service to the concept -- you want free speech, they point you west, across the Atlantic.) -- Snarglefoop (talk) 02:40, 24 May 2019 (UTC)

Snarglefoop, I added indentation. (But my style for years on a primitive monitor has always been to return to my original indentation rather than always do n+1.) Our rule granting former Uncyclopedians the right to give a link to their new home ought not to depend on what we think of their choice. The Fork's recent "press release," again asserting that they are us and we are not, does not change my opinion of the Fork in the slightest. Apropos of nothing, I see plenty of people conspiring to wreck the world. But that is who I think the Forkers are, too: Win the war, at the end of the day having made no positive contribution. Spıke 🎙️02:57 24-May-19

Check out Geeky's page. We're getting showered with them. -- Snarglefoop (talk) 02:55, 24 May 2019 (UTC)

Link, please? 02:57 24-May-19 I see it. That's legit, same rule. Spıke 🎙️02:59 24-May-19

Something weird about User:Supergeeky1 -- the page claims that the user has moved to "User:Sikon" on the fork, when AFAIK Sikon is a different person. Also, Geeky already had the Un-Supergeeky1 account, and I can tell he logged in with it. We don't know who really owns "Supergeeky1". ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr • talk • contribs • 03:04 24 May 2019

I have the feeling we're about to want the ability to check IPs in some form or another. It's not a panacea but when the snakes come slithering in the windows it can provide one more small clue as to where they're coming from. I still favor Checkuser, to be given to selected honchos on the site, rather than any back-door method, but ... maybe we need a forum on it. -- Snarglefoop (talk) 03:15, 24 May 2019 (UTC)

Checkuser would probably be ideal. Start a forum thread.

Going back: point made about links, but making nice to people who have been trouble is beyond me. And I think Spike's and Llwy's recent moaning about Factfinder makes you hypocritical about that. You are preaching to the choir and the choir does not want to hear it. Nor does the choir like to be ordered to fix Factfinder's crap on Cellphone Decade.

As for gender, I hope you do realize that Miley Spears was essentially a catfishing sock, not sexually, but to present a persona, an aggressive persona, not remotely suspected of being Alden Loveshade. You never have to be what you actually are, but there is a question of why you are doing it in a specific situation rather than maintaining a general online persona. Trolls present a persona and Miley was pretty close to a troll if there ever was one.

New topic: " ...otherwise I would have to reapply for Admin. And wouldn't that be a disruptive crap-fest?!" To you. You've been gone for two years, and a lot of water has passed under the bridge, including that Uncyc would be dead in the water if Llwy hadn't stepped in when FANDOM left the site broken. So you can just walk in and start throwing your weight around because... why? One of your last official acts was to greet me and give me a few pointers. Thank you for that; it is and was appreciated. But I walked into a ghost town. Looking at earlier history, it was clear that you had chased out the bad writers, but you might have chased out the good ones as well. It took a long, long time before there was real activity here, except for Romartus (and I'll include myself and even HolUp/Abacab333). The site only showed real signs of life just as FANDOM announced the divorce. And so here we are on this little island. Again.

Therefore, it all makes no sense again if nothing is done to build traffic back up. At this point, the most visible problems look to be solved. So while you continue to labor on with the tech stuff, it's all for naught without bodies to read as well as write. You will laugh at me, no doubt, but I have mailed Jimbo Wales as a last resort to ask for release of the .org domain name. That's a priority to the site, I would think; it's been an issue for CarlB certainly. You could have done that and I'm sure you do not appreciate minions speaking for Uncyclopedia, but it's done. -- (talk) 03:27, 24 May 2019 (UTC)

Holy crap -- I would never have thought of that. Of course, not sure he can (or will) do anything but it sure can't hurt. -- Snarglefoop (talk) 03:33, 24 May 2019 (UTC)

" ... they rolled around on the ground, pummeling each other, while the third stood over them, hitting them with a stick in an effort to get them to calm down..." Not a great technique, granted, but none the less I'd like to say I hope you guys don't chase each other off the site. I mean, I really hope that. It would be a big loss either way. -- Snarglefoop (talk) 03:39, 24 May 2019 (UTC)

(edit conflict) Sorry you got piled onto like this. I understand if you're frustrated, but I'm confused -- Zana has been gone since 2015. Leaving a random user page nobody visits as is is "making nice to people who have been trouble"? And this has to do with building traffic? What we need are inbound links. If someone never visits the site in the first place, it doesn't matter whether they might see a link to the fork on it. ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr • talk • contribs • 03:41 24 May 2019

Spiders. It may not matter much but it does matter. Snarglefoop (talk) 04:16, 24 May 2019 (UTC)

Nigel, I do not believe I have "thrown my weight around" except to know what the rules used to be, and also to reanimate my old domains, UnNews and VFD. Yes, it was a ghost town. Yes, I might have prevented this if I had not left just as you arrived. This does not mean I had a duty to stay forever. I mention, in Forum:Uncyclopedia's new home#Optimism and at the bottom of my user page, how the game has changed just now.

On the important points, yes! attracting an audience. Wikia has no reason to help us, and Jimbo is no more going to intervene than he would intervene in the salary discussions on an elevator operator he met. The Fork has an active motive not to ever let us get mentioned. Usually, if you want an audience, you have to advertise. Spıke 🎙️03:48 24-May-19

Now, Nigel, on Cellphone Decade, I did not "order" you to do anything. Given a gathering notion that Factfinder was spraying junk everywhere, I saw that you were essentially the author of that article, and hoped you would confirm my notion that his edits were not positive. We all fix crap that befalls articles we care about, and in this case it was easy: everything he ever added. Nor did I intend to assign you to repair the rest of his damage, but I was pleased when you indicated that you would study it. Spıke 🎙️03:57 24-May-19

Looking into old posts, I saw you have high standards for humor writing. That's fine, but since this is an amateur site, I think the bar has to be set lower. That's my opinion only. You had a lot of posts critical of people's writing where the writer probably wasn't capable of producing what you expected. Everyone can read anything, so people without strong egos but decent writers would also bug out at that point. Then that leaves you with the big egos to fight, causing more people to leave. Result: ghost town. Now I'm not saying that that was the only factor in the decline, as FANDOM published a graph showing its overall decline since its peak about 2013, with Uncyclopedia doing the same. I blame this primarily on the rise of people living on their phones, absorbing but not creating the content they live on. This should bode well for having writers here, but there are a lot more free outlets than before to do comedy writing.

Contacting Wales may be fruitless but one should try what avenues are available. It's getting old hearing about what FANDOM and the forksters are or are not doing. Focus on the more important issues is appreciated.

On Cellphone Decade, didn't you know Romartus and I were already aware of Factfinder and his shenanigans? All you had to do is ask about him. I think I told you as much in the email chain. You know I've already given him short bans twice for bad and sloppy writing. If nobody complains, what am I supposed to do? So damned if I do and damned if I don't ban him. Don't write what sounds like an order if it's not meant to be one. You don't have to be obsequious and use a mandatory please and thank you, either. Consider the rest of the Factfinder edit reviews (still ongoing) as a bonus since reading about attacks on the small press doesn't translate into my doing much comedy writing afterwards. -- (talk) 06:48, 24 May 2019 (UTC)

On the issue of phones, I understood from the Wikia people that uncyclopedia was accessed more via that method than a computer. So what ever we do, we will require a way of creating an app to do the same as we had at the old site. Also I agree that pre-existing links on a user's page should continue. And..can we keep our hats on please? --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 09:33, 24 May 2019 (UTC)

Uncyclopedia2.0 on VFD

Llwy says in the Forum that your edits to this article may have gotten lost in the move. My own vote against this article was independent of your work. Your most recent comment on the ballot seems like a vote against! If you believe the article is "still a stub that looks like an ad", would you please flip to Delete? Spıke 🎙️15:36 26-May-19

To clarify: I made no edit of any significance to the article. I am pretty sure I added the VFD tag only (recorded in history), then reported the article to the VFD page. The stub that I saw had The Pioneer JP (now The Pioneer) writing in bad ESL fashion to imitate some idiot writing about 2.0, done throughout the entire article. And it was left a stub shorter than this for quite some time, the reason for the VFD.

Even though the the last section remains (and may or may not be in the original that I recall), I thought enough progress had been made to save it after the nom for VFD and changed my vote. It's Pioneer's complete edit record that is apparently missing.

• Article says the last edit was 30 January 2019. This date is not in the revision history. Further edit(s) by Pioneer must have been made afterwards based on the 31 Jan discussion with Llwy about the original being put up for VFD and on my dated vote change in April.
• A stub tag is at the bottom of the article. Who added that?; there's no record of who did that unless it was Pioneer. Doubtful. That also makes no sense in light of the article now being much longer than I believe it was. And what admin would put this at the bottom of an article? I wouldn't do that; it can't be immediately recognized.
• I have suspected some edit history from other articles is missing since the move. Some of Factfinder's edits from the last months at Wikia I suspect may be unrecorded in revision history. Otherwise I have no specifics that I can think of right now except for this one. However, I am pretty sure articles are complete and up-to-date. I'll report anything that looks obvious in missing history if I find it. But if it's lost now, it's probably lost forever(?). And is it really worth the time to track each lost piece of article history? That's a rhetorical question; it's up to you. -- (talk) 21:14, 26 May 2019 (UTC)

I pulled the Uncyclopedia2.0 page out of the XML dump from Wikia and the last revision in it is from 2019-01-30T21:43:08Z by Nigel, which is consistent with what we've got. The text of that revision sure looks like the text we've got, as well (though I didn't do a by-character comparison, just a glance-over). There are three revisions to the page altogether, two from the 15th and one from the thirtieth, which also matches what we've got. I don't see any evidence that we're missing anything on that page. (Is this even what you were discussing here? Have I gone entirely off-topic? Hmmm....) -- Snarglefoop (talk) 23:43, 26 May 2019 (UTC)

You both are off my topic, my assertion that this is "still a stub that looks like an ad" because it is an ad.

We agree that what we are seeing is the current version. To the topic of whether edits are not present in the history, we need the author, now using User:The Pioneer. He had a brief stay in the content space, but more recently, has been nominated for Admin at Miraheze. To Nigel's rhetorical question, I don't think further study is worth the time. But that will be a tautology if y'all will help me VFD it. Spıke 🎙️23:58 26-May-19

User:Nigel Scribbler/Works

I suggest you not hide this but put it on your user page, as I keep comparable badges on mine. Better than Lorem Ipsum. Spıke 🎙️02:08 28-May-19

Baptism Mosaic

Who censored Jesus's tackle? --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 15:37, 6 August 2019 (UTC)

A very deep religiophilosophical question, that one. It just wouldn't do to have Myrtle with man bits. Too lazy to put a floaty toy in place. -- (talk) 18:59, 6 August 2019 (UTC)

Returning users

Offered without recommendation:

• You left an invitation to User:Tn129719 on his talk page at Wikia and he has returned. Only contributions ever have been to insert photos of his own or someone else's arse on two pages, one evidently created under a previous user name. I mentioned this to Romartus and he replied with optimism. But I have deleted the photos of the arse, and removed their references from the two articles, in one case removing an entire section.
• User:Factfinder's one-month ban has expired and he seems to have picked up exactly where he left off. I sparred with him briefly on his talk page. When I last checked in on White people, it was short and breezy; 300 of his edits later, it is ponderous, perhaps based on facts you might find on Conservapedia, but scolding and shoving the reader (more in my vote against on VFH). Southern Baptists lacks the obsessive typography but it, too, demands that the reader understand the author, and offers the reader very little. These articles fail Poe's Law. Spıke 🎙️23:42 20-Aug-19

RE:Tn129719. Not so. Joining 17 May 2019, he would not have been given a FANDOM account, nor is there one under that name, checked today. There is a message on his Uncyc talk page which did not pass to his email. I do not assume responsibility for this user or his content as you seem to think. With his only contribution being 2 minor edits, how are butt pictures to be anticipated. And tits are okay but butts are not? Mmmkay.

RE:Factfinder. You are either an idiot or a sociopath if you think you can win an argument with this cat. You are no idiot so it is the latter. You keep blaming me for this user existing, another show of sociopathy. You certainly seem to want the site all to yourself (sociopathy) and you are certainly getting your way (sociopathy). You don't own the site, and most of us didn't give you the role of site dictator. With your voluntary absence, it is doubtful whether you should even have admin credentials much less crat credentials. Do everyone a favor by disappearing for a few years again so you can spend all your time fighting Factfinder and whoever you like offsite. If you want to fight, I'll fight you, but you won't have very much fun. -- (talk) 22:15, 21 August 2019 (UTC)

Repeat: Offered without recommendation. I do not hold you responsible for anyone else's edits. I assumed Tn129719 was here because you informed him, and mentioned him to you because you might know more about him than I. I deleted his pix not for obscenity (they are not) but for vanity/cyberbullying, depending on whose butt. Am sure I will not win an argument with Factfinder; that is the point. I mentioned him to you because you banned him last and might want to know he is back and unchastened. If I were the dictator you think I am, I would have banned him myself. Unless you are a psychiatrist and have interviewed me, please curtail the armchair diagnoses. Spıke 🎙️22:45 21-Aug-19

System administrator

Hello. I was trying to get in contact with Llwy-ar-lawr but their talk page is protected. Are you also one of the system administrators of Uncyclopedia? SayuriDarling | "No one is born in this world to be alone." 05:10, 11 November 2019 (UTC)

Yes I am. Llwy has been under attack lately, so that's the reason for the block. I can post a message for you there if you like. -- (talk) 06:31, 11 November 2019 (UTC)

The system administrators are the people who run the server -- that would be me and Snarglefoop. His talk page is open. ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr • talk • contribs • 02:43 26 November 2019

Sorry, I misunderstood the question, which is about par for the course. My apologies to both of you. -- (talk) 10:05, 26 November 2019 (UTC)

Article restore

Hi Nigel. If possible, could you resurrect the article Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi and move it to my userspace so I can rewrite it? I'm aiming to write articles for all the Star Wars movies, in anticipation of the last one coming out this year.--HolUp (talk) 10:19, 26 November 2019 (UTC)

Okay, done. Now as User:HolUp/Star_Wars_Episode_VI:_Return_of_the_Jedi. This one is pretty bad; you have your work cut out for you. Maybe it's best just to use as a skeleton?? Go ahead and remove the tags.

I really like what you've been doing of late. Hope you can work some magic with this stinker. Please link it on the front page New Articles section whenever done. Thanks. -- (talk) 10:33, 26 November 2019 (UTC)

So, I remember user Irritable of contents creating an article on the planet Geonosis back in 2017, however when I click on the link there's no logs going back to 2017. Was this one of the pages lost in the database shuffle?--HolUp (talk) 01:58, 29 November 2019 (UTC)

Since the article was VFDed, could I have a copy for my userspace? Also I remember writing an article on Gene Simmons, but that may've gotten VFDed too; could I also get a copy of that? Thanks.--HolUp (talk) 02:39, 29 November 2019 (UTC)

Okay, both transferred to you userspace. -- (talk) 02:57, 29 November 2019 (UTC)

Looks like Gene Simmons and Geonosis were both "deleted" by a software problem, not VFD. I only found this out after finally locating all the missing pages. (It was a major pain in the butt.) The rest are back, BTW, so you won't get tripped up again. Sorry. ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr • talk • contribs • 02:28 23 December 2019

Great on finding the missing pages. We were still able to recover what was needed, so no problems, really. -- (talk) 03:03, 23 December 2019 (UTC)

Tyciol

Hi Nigel. A few of us over at the other site uncovered some information pertaining to an old editor here, and we felt you guys should know about it.

Un-Tyciol is a self-admitted pedophile and apparently has a history of moderating various "childlove" communities around the web. He and his sockpuppets have been blocked a number of times across the Wikimedia projects as a result. Encyclopedia Dramatica has a page dedicated to him that I'm unable to link (thanks to the abusefilter), but Googling his username will turn up many more dodgy results, such as his very own /r/jailb8 subreddit, and the inevitable Stormfront posts that seem to come with this territory. Because of how the user tables were imported in 2013, his account isn't showing up as valid on the other site and we're not able to block him. That doesn't seem to be an issue over here, so you guys should be able to handle him as you see fit. He isn't presently a huge concern, considering his last edit was 2014, but we felt it was important to notify the community here about his online activities regardless.

I hope all is well in Uncyclopedia.ca Land. Much love. Supergeeky1 (talk) 21:47, 12 January 2020 (UTC)

I've reviewed all Un-Tyciol's uploads here; some were already orphaned-by-revert, I reverted and deleted a few more. The vast majority were prurient, from clothing (and unclothing) of toddlers to a porn cartoon. Have not gone over all his contributions. Spıke 🎙️23:42 12-Jan-20

Good. I'm not so sure he last edited in 2014, since Special:Contributions/Tycio may be him too. ❦ Llwy-ar-lawr • talk • contribs • 00:20 13 January 2020

Tycio is surely the same guy, down to editing his own and another's talk pages to add a level-one head to indicate the time of the posts. Spıke 🎙️00:27 13-Jan-20

Your signature

At Uncyclopedia:VFH/Super Mario Odyssey, your sig file User:Nigel Scribbler/sig was disrupting the template that produces the table in the VFH summary. I replaced it with a link to your user page. I see nothing remarkable in your sig file. Do you have vertical bars in your My preferences that controls the insertion of the signature? Spıke 🎙️01:36 1-Apr-21

Format is Subst:Nosubst|User:Nigel Scribbler/sig enclosed in double brackets. It worked before and everywhere.-- (talk) 04:45, 1 April 2021 (UTC)

User:Frosty/Japanese‎

I was going to main space this but ermm..some of the language here is bit too overtly racist. So either we re-work this to throw that stuff out or leave it be. --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 10:34, 23 April 2021 (UTC)

As an add, I thought this was an article by Frosty but not according to the page history. I presumed he adopted it with the intention of improving it? --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 10:46, 23 April 2021 (UTC)

Reverted except for the epithet. I suppose I should be reading every article whilst I work on categories and such, but there's too much to do otherwise. It hardly matters since it already appears on 4 category pages and was picked up by 6 foreign language versions (do they still exist?). Uncyc has plenty of racist articles anyway, particularly by racists who are afraid to say the word "nigger" in public. So, they just freely attack others.

So, what now? I'm not rewriting this. Kill it if nobody will rewrite this right now.

In a related vein, I was just listening to Dr. Robert Sapolsky where he has determined that "us" vs. "them" kicks in immmediately in most people on seeing or meeting others. Very sad and depressing. To him, too. -- (talk) 11:15, 23 April 2021 (UTC) (does the sig render properly here? If not, I'll dump it)

If you're referring to the previous section, your sig always renders properly, even when it seemed to break the VFH template. We had the same thing happening this morning (mentioned on my talk page), which I resolved by removing Romartus's and my signature files, though the same three voters had voted on another nomination without incident. No such thing ever happens on VFD. Spıke 🎙️13:03 23-Apr-21

Sig issue puzzling. Regards Dr. Robert Sapolsky, one for me to check. --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 16:20, 23 April 2021 (UTC)

hi

hi--152.22.44.22 15:33, 13 December 2021 (UTC)

Hi yourself and Happy New Year. Yep, it's me, but I can only answer if SOME ASSHOLE NAMED SPIKE didn't come along and baleet all of my incoming messages.--Nigel Scribbler (talk) 08:29, 1 January 2022 (UTC)

Classic Spike.... (laugh track plays while looking at the camera) OnePunch 08:33, 1 January 2022 (UTC)

This was one of the daily visits of I.P. Anon during mid-December. If allowed to continue, he would petition for the unblocking of Mr. "Poop fart", then go on to cruft up our pages. I banned him and hit Revert All. Forgive me if you actually wanted to reply to him. Spıke 🎙️12:40 1-Jan-22

Forgive you, Reichskanzler? There is no forgiving the asswipe shit you continue to pull. You deserve the worst for the times you have deleted mail sent to me. Paranoia and absolute control rules all, eh? Do realize that one of those messages was sent from the fork who would not send it to you because you are you. And that was useful info. This "I.P. Anon" is just kid that has been steered away from doing the same basically dumb stuff on other wikis. Maybe you have opened the door for his friends to get into vandalizing Uncyclopedia by slamming the door on him here. Face it, you have zero ability to deal with human beings and their subtleties. --Nigel Scribbler (talk) 05:22, 12 January 2022 (UTC)

Ikr hes just admin abuseing I made a few small edits and suddenly he feels the need to block my entire range 62.102.148.69 21:24, 27 January 2022 (UTC)

First off, you have to realize that Spike is a grade-A neoNazi control freak. I don't write articles here anymore because he will always edit to his taste only and manages to wring most if not all of the humor out of an article. Since everything he does is perfect in his mind, he reverted your edits back to his even though your syntax corrections were indeed correct. Apparently, being wrong that way is very critical for Featured articles (NOT), which are not supposed to be touched in any meaningful way. IMO, they should be allowed if a comment is added, but then, I'm not a neoNazi.

Note that Spike deleted your messages to me as he has deleted other messages. --Nigel Scribbler (talk) 08:59, 3 February 2022 (UTC)

how it started

He Banned Me because I made a few edits on a page about wikihow and yes I am talking about Spike this is been going on for months he started all of this he's responsible for it if he never did this none of this would have happened but no he wants to act like a man-child for months 62.102.148.69 21:32, 27 January 2022 (UTC)

I strongly suggest you go and help out some other wiki. If you get unbanned here, he'll just keep reverting your edits, because he's that kind of person, if that can be called being a person. --Nigel Scribbler (talk) 09:02, 3 February 2022 (UTC)

This IP is Brogo13. He is not banned here since I lifted that a few days ago via email. If you check Brogo13 on Wikipedia you will see he has a permaban there on the same grounds of re-writing featured articles which go beyond mere grammatical error changes. He als ogot a ban from the Fork for the same reasons. That was the deal for him to return to the Spoon. Leave featurerd articles alone which he agreed. RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 09:40, 3 February 2022 (UTC)

Without a checkuser I'm not sure it's Brogo13. Brogo13 is characteristically cryptic and wouldn't make a run-on sentence. The "I made a few edits on a page about wikihow" suggests this edit by Dellorfanaccount.

Brogo13 actually is blocked right now; Spike blocked him for a week for insubordination after Romartus lifted the block. Dark Web, White Hat (talk) 10:12, 3 February 2022 (UTC)

This Anon is not Brogo13 but probably "Poop fart". When he shows up, I ban him and revert-all his edits. Nigel, it has nothing to do with you personally, it is not an attempt to expunge history but to deny a vandal recognition. Your effort to chat him up does not help, unless he takes to heart your recommendation that he find another website. If he reappears here, I will indeed keep banning him. Spıke 🎙️11:14 3-Feb-22

Ok I understand this anon is someone else. RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 13:51, 3 February 2022 (UTC)

Check emails

Can you check your USAG account? Thanks. RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 16:38, 18 October 2022 (UTC)