「UnNews:BP's chief meerkat caught cheating」の版 間 の差分
| 16 |
16 |
||
''..I was treated very badly by Stash-Roubles Rosneft. I told my wife 'TNK' that I was just popping out of the room for a stroll and the next thing I knew, I was in a different room three floors below and being introduced to Madame Rosneft in her shower. It was innocent, I was only holding the soap when the next thing I knew, our meeting had gone public and Mrs TNK was threatening to remove my assets with a pair of scissors.'' |
''..I was treated very badly by Stash-Roubles Rosneft. I told my wife 'TNK' that I was just popping out of the room for a stroll and the next thing I knew, I was in a different room three floors below and being introduced to Madame Rosneft in her shower. It was innocent, I was only holding the soap when the next thing I knew, our meeting had gone public and Mrs TNK was threatening to remove my assets with a pair of scissors.'' |
||
| − | So far BP says there are 'fully behind' |
+ | So far BP says there are 'fully behind' Orlov - with a large stone to drop on him from a great height. |
2011年 4月 14日 (木) 14:03時点 における版
|
This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
14 April 2011
LONDON, United Kingdom.-- BP's chief cuddly oil boss meerkat has been exposed as 'two-timing rat' when it was revealed he has been bed hopping in Moscow this week.
Aleksandr Orlov, who is Chief Rodent of BP, was caught emerging from the bedroom of Russian oil flirt, Madame Stash-Roubles Rosneft after he had earlier booked into the hotel with another slick partner (identified as Mrs TNK-BP) earlier than evening. When collared and put on lead by the police, Orlov protested that he was 'only doing what any free meerkat would do' and had been looking for another 'friend' to share a burrow with and compare his wife too. He also denied he was a 'love anything' and suggested Mrs TNK-BP had approved of her partner's financially promiscuous behavior - but attempts to get her to bail out her erstwhile husband were met with a switched off telephone.
This isn't the first time Orlov has been caught with oily paws. Last year. Orlov took on the job of Chairmeerkat of BP following a fight outside his home in the tv series Meerkat Manor. His fiesty behavior then and a reputation as a telegenic sales meerkat who could sell bad insurance got him noticed by BP. However as power went to hid hind legs, Orlov decided to spread some of his 'meerkat charisma' around.
Orlov was eventually released and spoke to UnNews by a tin-can-on-a-string link with one of our reporters.
..I was treated very badly by Stash-Roubles Rosneft. I told my wife 'TNK' that I was just popping out of the room for a stroll and the next thing I knew, I was in a different room three floors below and being introduced to Madame Rosneft in her shower. It was innocent, I was only holding the soap when the next thing I knew, our meeting had gone public and Mrs TNK was threatening to remove my assets with a pair of scissors.
So far BP says there are 'fully behind' Orlov - with a large stone to drop on him from a great height.
Sources
- Staff "BP's recent problems" Daily Telegraph, April 14, 2011
- Staff "BP's oil dance" Sky News, April 14, 2011