Race car
“Vroom!”
A race car is a type of fancy car that people buy when they want to show off their money or if they have a midlife crisis. They go very fast and make a vroom sound. Someday I will buy a race car. It will happen. What was I talking about?
Who likes them[編集 | ソースを編集 ]
Again, only middle-aged dads like race cars, and those bozos who live in Indiana. Race car is also a palindrome, but you probably didn’t care about that. Racing is a sport that involves race cars, and fatal accidents that the lawyers deny. The Indy 500 is a popular race that everyone pretends to like but really doesn’t.
Origin[編集 | ソースを編集 ]
Race cars were invented in 420 in New New New Mexico when one guy wanted to go very very fast. He built the first one out of human skin, motor oil, olive oil, and gears. He achieved his goal and went very very fast. Obama would have personally congratulated this man, but Obama decided not to because Obama did not yet exist. The first time a race car was sold was 1912, when some guy said, I want some money! And he decided to make a race car based on old prototypes, and sold it for $
The War on Racing | |||||||
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Belligerents | |||||||
Person
Total dead
0 | Other person Total dead
1.1 |
Use in warfare[編集 | ソースを編集 ]
Race cars have been historically used to run people over at high speeds. They were first used against the Germans in WW2. That may sound brutal, but so is everything else in war. It continued to be used by Americans in the wars in the Middle East. Their usage was permitted by George W. Bush, who declared, “what the heck, I’m the president, let’s do something stupid!”.
The first race[編集 | ソースを編集 ]
Racing started when some people wanted to beat each other up, and they decided, “What if we could do that in CARS?” So they did! They bought a track in Antarctica, and raced the hell out of each other. One participant died. Yay!