Industrial strength homo-erotic pornography

Industrial strength homo-erotic pornography is the "real" porn that gets smuggled from Toronto via Buffalo, and is de facto currency in of some parts of the United States. This type of pornography is also commonly available on the Internet and typically accessed by accident.^[1]

Industrial strength homo-erotic pornography is the only kind of pornography that can withstand earthquakes, tsunamis, volcanic eruptions, landslides, apocalyptic locusts, flaming hamster invasions and almost^[2] every other disaster imaginable. Except penguins – those things'll getcha. And any other animals that are black and white. Like pandas ... and badgers ... and Japan ... and lemurs ... but not zebras. Those things are just lame. They don't do a damn thing.

One might ask: What about police cars and nuns? I live next to a police station that uses the traditional black-and-white vehicles and next to a Catholic church ... so I'm not sure if my industrial strength homo-erotic porn is threatened or not.

Rest assured, police cars pose no more threat to your industrial strength homo-erotic pornography than any other type of automobile. Nuns, on the other hand, are not covered by the warranty as they are considered Acts of God.